i don't know what should i update about?

i should learn how to let go and move on with my life.

I just cant stop thinking of a person.He is my ex bf,Edwin Tan.We used to be a couple 3year(hope i guess correctly)ago.I have hurt him too deeply.There are things that cant use words to express.I am here to,blog it on post,to tell him that I LOVE YOU!I want you to know my sincerity.I have not forgotten you since the day i broke up with you.I have regretted.

After i broke up with you,then i realised that actually is not that i don't love you,is that i don't know how to face you.After breaking up with you,i kept thinking of you most of the times until now.I remembered you was by my side when i was admitted to Mount Alvernia hospital.You came and visited me during midnight.I'm so touched by then.I really miss the days we been together. I still in love with you.

After i did some reflection,i realised that i treated you badly.I shouldn't left you alone after service.I shouldn't kick you one side.After the BBQ,I shouldn't keep cold to you when we were in the bus and train.I really regretted.I'm sorry.Although i am 1year older than you,but you never mind my age at all. I will slowly love you more and more each day,if you give me this chance to do.Now i know,losing you are more important than anything.I have no face to ask you for forgiveness or to love me once again.I just hope that you will forgive me the way i acted out a few years ago. What i really hope is that let's start afresh...

Edwin Tan,can you give me a chance to make it up?Can you give me and you a chance to be together again?I lost you once,i don't want to lost you twice.

This time round,i know myself very clearly!

Edwin Tan,I LOVE YOU!

I scratch my both hands due to my illness.It left scars on my both hands.Which is very ugly.Whenever i went down to buy food,or to buy drinks,the people will definatly asked me how come my hands become like that and look at my hands differently.Even a strangers walk pass me,they will glance at my hands differently too.I hate the way they look at me.

I felt so guilty that in the first place,i shouldnt scratch my hands.But now,it's too late.Scars will be with me forever until i die.I'm trying not to scratch myself,but i just cant control.Hopefully,medicines can help me.I hope that one day,nobody look down on me as well as strangers.

I will be strong! =)

i'm back to blog again! =)

I'm staying at home for the past few days.Somehow,among this few days,i got relapse once again.Due to the scary dreamt i have dream few days back,it wokes me up in the middle of the night.I couldnt sleep well either.Next thursday is my appointment at IMH.Hopefully everything goes well because my condition now is still not stable yet.

Well,i will take care of myself. =)

Those who wana know my illness,i cant reveal because it's privacy.haha..

Next,i miss all my classmates and they are the one who always brighten up my day in school.I barely meet them cuz i am no longer in their class.But sometimes i will still sms them,asking them how's their days and etc..

gtg..

*Yawn*

Yesterday i went out with my friend and we catch a movie called "blood ties".At first,i thought is a scary movie but it turned up to be the most lousy movie in 2009 commented by a few people who watched the same movie as us.The movie kept on repeating the story again and again.It's so bored.We have to pay $6.50 each for the lousy movie.Wasting my time and money.

After watching the movie,we went to starbuck coffee for drinks while chit chatting.The coffee taste nice as coffeebean coffee.I reached home almost 11plus at night.I told my friend that let's go out again before her school start.hehex..fun going out with her.haha..

好久不见了!我的朋友还好吗?

Before i changed my hp number,HE sms me,telling me how much he missed me.I won't deny that i have feeling for me,but for my safety,i chose to leave him.I feeling very sad.Nevermind.I still have a long way to go.It means that i and him are not fated to be together.I learnt how to let go.

I have stop schooling due to my illness.I can only go back to school next year April 2010.Now,i am staying at home surfing net or going out with my friends.That's my life.

Name:kArEn aka KaR lInG
Age:20
School:BLGPS>>>BLSS>>>>Simei ITE
B.O.D:12th April 1989

!!LOV3!! :D
GOD!
Dark Chocolate
Mocha Coffee from Coffee Bean
Puppies
W317/W237 peeps
MSN Chatting
Watching Movie
Puzzling
Winnie the Pooh Stuff

!!H@T3S!!
Back-Stabbers
Proud
Act Smart
Bad Personality
Being forced
Being alone

New tops
New bottom
High Heeels Shoe
Portable DVD player
Eglible for my course in Higher Nitec
Bags
Beautiful Clock in my room
Winnie the Pooh Limited Edition Watch

Free shoutbox @ ShoutMix

HuiPing
HuiChing
KiWi
Edwin Ng
Lee Wee
Judy
Yingyi
Crystal
Priscilla
Felicia(Blss)
MeliSsa
HuiCi
Jenny
SweeHeng
BaoWei
Edwin Tan
Yishan
Joleen
Felicia(IMM)
Karen
Gwen
WeiDa
Annie
Maureen
Mei Xian
Angela
Jin Hua
Joshua
Yimin
Vincent
Terence
Soki
W317 & W237
Yixian
Jinyu
Valerie
Nandy
Rebecca
Fad
Derence
PL1T