pocket of stars

2010-03-04T20:36:00.002+08:00

今天好下不了台哦.我尽然在我医生面前哭.我好难过喔.忍不住就哭了出来.进不了理工学院,对我来说是个很大的打激.我真的不自所错.

我看我需要的是时间吧...

2010-03-03T15:14:00.002+08:00

好久没见了.

我好想他.每天只能看看他的照片.

是我一手毁掉我的前途.学业和我的身体.好难过.

2010-01-26T16:20:00.003+08:00

wow!it have been some time didnt update my blog.reallly going to rot soon.haha..Well,i have been busy helping my father to sell cuttlefish at chinatown.so tired.everyday reach home about 1plus in the morning.so tired.haha..but i didnt follow him to work in the morning.i only go at night.haha.slack abit..hehex..

Hey guys!if u want to buy cuttlefish,go to chinatown find me.We are located at temple street,called "deng po jie".If not,you all can give me a call and i'll bring you all down to my dad's place. =) Good service.haha.. :P

2010-01-07T23:14:00.002+08:00

wow!have been days didnt update my blog le.my blog going to rot soon.haha..

have not been sleeping well for the past few weeks.keep having nightmares.Sleeping pills doesnt help me much too.what shall i do?

is it a responsiblity to update my blog?

who's know?

2010-01-01T20:50:00.002+08:00

I'm so happy that i can be discharged today.Hehex..Though was admitted for a few days,still not used to staying at home.Today feel abit uncomfortable reaching home.Seem something is not right.haha.

Yesterday my friends came to visit me,thanks! =

2009-12-28T17:56:00.002+08:00

Tomorrow i need to go down NUH for my lower back bone surgery.Though this is not my first time,i will still feel afraid.I will be admitted and stay there for 1day and a half.On the 30th,i can be discharged.Hopefully everything will be alright. =)

Btw,I'm here to wish everyone a Merry Christmas & Happy New Year! =)

2009-12-20T22:17:00.002+08:00

I'm wondering why guys always speak louder than action?It's hard to know what guys are thinking about.I'm really lost.

I gave my ex a call,it seems like he is trying to avoid me.Why?Cant we be friend after we broke up?Why are you so cruel?haiz.. Disappointed with guys.

I should live for myself,not for guys.

2009-11-04T13:20:00.003+08:00

i don't know what should i update about?

2009-10-04T12:27:00.001+08:00

i should learn how to let go and move on with my life.

2009-09-26T16:00:00.008+08:00

I just cant stop thinking of a person.He is my ex bf,Edwin Tan.We used to be a couple 3year(hope i guess correctly)ago.I have hurt him too deeply.There are things that cant use words to express.I am here to,blog it on post,to tell him that I LOVE YOU!I want you to know my sincerity.I have not forgotten you since the day i broke up with you.I have regretted.

After i broke up with you,then i realised that actually is not that i don't love you,is that i don't know how to face you.After breaking up with you,i kept thinking of you most of the times until now.I remembered you was by my side when i was admitted to Mount Alvernia hospital.You came and visited me during midnight.I'm so touched by then.I really miss the days we been together. I still in love with you.

After i did some reflection,i realised that i treated you badly.I shouldn't left you alone after service.I shouldn't kick you one side.After the BBQ,I shouldn't keep cold to you when we were in the bus and train.I really regretted.I'm sorry.Although i am 1year older than you,but you never mind my age at all. I will slowly love you more and more each day,if you give me this chance to do.Now i know,losing you are more important than anything.I have no face to ask you for forgiveness or to love me once again.I just hope that you will forgive me the way i acted out a few years ago. What i really hope is that let's start afresh...

Edwin Tan,can you give me a chance to make it up?Can you give me and you a chance to be together again?I lost you once,i don't want to lost you twice.

This time round,i know myself very clearly!

Edwin Tan,I LOVE YOU!

2009-09-26T13:58:00.002+08:00

I scratch my both hands due to my illness.It left scars on my both hands.Which is very ugly.Whenever i went down to buy food,or to buy drinks,the people will definatly asked me how come my hands become like that and look at my hands differently.Even a strangers walk pass me,they will glance at my hands differently too.I hate the way they look at me.

I felt so guilty that in the first place,i shouldnt scratch my hands.But now,it's too late.Scars will be with me forever until i die.I'm trying not to scratch myself,but i just cant control.Hopefully,medicines can help me.I hope that one day,nobody look down on me as well as strangers.

I will be strong! =)

2009-09-19T18:34:00.002+08:00

i'm back to blog again! =)

I'm staying at home for the past few days.Somehow,among this few days,i got relapse once again.Due to the scary dreamt i have dream few days back,it wokes me up in the middle of the night.I couldnt sleep well either.Next thursday is my appointment at IMH.Hopefully everything goes well because my condition now is still not stable yet.

Well,i will take care of myself. =)

Those who wana know my illness,i cant reveal because it's privacy.haha..

Next,i miss all my classmates and they are the one who always brighten up my day in school.I barely meet them cuz i am no longer in their class.But sometimes i will still sms them,asking them how's their days and etc..

gtg..

*Yawn*

2009-09-16T14:30:00.002+08:00

Yesterday i went out with my friend and we catch a movie called "blood ties".At first,i thought is a scary movie but it turned up to be the most lousy movie in 2009 commented by a few people who watched the same movie as us.The movie kept on repeating the story again and again.It's so bored.We have to pay $6.50 each for the lousy movie.Wasting my time and money.

After watching the movie,we went to starbuck coffee for drinks while chit chatting.The coffee taste nice as coffeebean coffee.I reached home almost 11plus at night.I told my friend that let's go out again before her school start.hehex..fun going out with her.haha..

2009-09-15T13:27:00.002+08:00

好久不见了!我的朋友还好吗?

Before i changed my hp number,HE sms me,telling me how much he missed me.I won't deny that i have feeling for me,but for my safety,i chose to leave him.I feeling very sad.Nevermind.I still have a long way to go.It means that i and him are not fated to be together.I learnt how to let go.

I have stop schooling due to my illness.I can only go back to school next year April 2010.Now,i am staying at home surfing net or going out with my friends.That's my life.

2009-07-30T12:45:00.002+08:00

wah!!what a long time didnt update my blog already.I guess it's going to rot soon.hehex..

Well,after my discharged,either i staying at home for the whole day or i have appointment with my doctor.Sometimes when i am bored,i will find my friends to go out with me.It's so tiring to travel here and there to go shopping.haha!

Actually,after discharged,i don't find myself doing quite well.I had a relapse at home and have to struggle because no one is at home except me.I'm so afraid to be at home alone.

Hmm..by the way,i am so happy that my dad bought a laptop for me.haha..Finally,i don't need to be afraid anymore(secret).Phew!Let's look forward for brighter future.hehex...

2009-07-09T11:52:00.002+08:00

Have a long time i didnt update my blog already.You guessed where have i been?It's so long since my last blog which is on May.Now is already July.haha..I have miss all my friends,my school mates and my bed.haha..

Actually,i was hospitalised since May until yesterday,just discharged.Miss me,ya?haha..I'm feeling much more better already,more strength to beat the battle that i'm fighting now.Don't worry about me,i will be fine.

I'm so sad that i couldnt return to school upon my discharged.I missed school life.I might not be able to go back to my class,likely put me in the new batch of class which starts in Sep 09 or Jan 2010. *Sad*

Anyway,i have to thank my friends who have came to visit during my stays in hospital.Thanks alot! =)

2009-05-19T22:11:00.002+08:00

Today isn't a good day for me as i'm emo-ing.I do not know how to describe how i felt at that period of time.What i can said is only saddness and tears inside my eyes.Poor thing me have to pretence nothing happen and just carried on with my lessons in school.I have been losing my concentration in school for days as i kept daze during yesterday lecture lesson.I don't know what's going on.

My medications has finished.I guessed that's the reason why i'm so emo today.I kept quiet in BNI class today and did the work with my partner and myself.During ESJ class,i still able to pay abit of attention and did my practical.

Thanks Soki once again for so caring,sitting beside me,lending me his ears and heed me some advice.
Thanks to my dearie friends who saw me cried in campus seven and comforted me.
Last but not least,thanks Mr Ismail for being my listening ears all the times,gave me advices and guide me through my tough times in school.

*Thanks for all the tissues*

I am feeling better now.Hope tomorrow lesson,i will not be emo again.

2009-05-15T20:39:00.002+08:00

Yeah!!!I am selected to go for Vietnam trip!!It's time for me to fly!!Woohhoooo!!!haha..as well,my urinary catether was taken out already...yea!!!Now,i can do any sports i want already!!

I am in a good spirit!Thanks God that he gave me the wisdom to talk during interview and i also need to thank !NANDY! for sending me a some sort prayer message to me.Thanks alot!Thanks to my friends who always lent me their ears.haha..So sorry!Have to listen to my !@#$%^&*()_+.haha..

Though i couldn't take part in the CE Track and Fields Competition this month,it's really disappoint me alot and upset,but there is nothing that can be help.I have to thanks soki for his tissues for me to wipe my tears.haha..

2009-05-11T16:50:00.002+08:00

hello everybody!I'm now in school updating my blog.I'm free now. =) I'm sick! =( I got cough and flu and somehow my left side of the back is so painful.I'm wondering is it my kidney have problems.*Worried*Somehow,i still come to school and i told my teacher that i am sick.I have 3 days MC.At first,my teacher asked me to go home but i refused to because i came all the way from Boon Lay to Simei.If you want me to go back,it's just a wasted trip.Though i feel giddy/dizzy,i still persist.

My competition is coming soon.In 2days times.I will be having High and Long jump competition which competeting with others A division students in Simei ITE.Yesterday,my tube dropped out from my private part and have to go to NUH A&E to put it back.Haix..i am wondering with my urine bag and the tube,how am i going to jump?God must enlightened me,please!!!I want to get top 3(atleast).

By the way,have to go back for lessons already.bye!

2009-05-08T19:34:00.002+08:00

oh my god!I didnt did well for my BNI online assessment test.The questions was asked so indirectly that i have to search and ask for the answer.Amias is the best!He helped me to answered most of the questions and i got 84.8%!!haha..Though i'm still not statisfy with my results,but,that's the fact.I can't change the result or what.So,i accepted it.

Teacher let us go off at 11a.m and some of our classmates have English Enrichment Course ar 2p.m and some of our classmates got CCAs at 2 or 2.30p.m also.So,I went to eat Seoul Garden with 3 of my classmates and chit chatting for 1 to 2hours plus.Then they have to go off already.So,i went to Tampines 1 toilet to changed into PE attire for my CCA and went to school.I thought i will be late but luckily the bus came on time.

When i reached school,i saw Joleen,Bin Quan they all.They all having Tennis CCA and as for me,i went to find my CCA mates.Only a few turn up,less than 10people,i guessed!haha..Today,we just did a light excerising and warm up.We ran 1round of the fields and jog 1round of the fields.Followed up,we went to practiced our long jump and high jump for twice.That's the things we did for today as Ms Asmah have to go off early.When i jumped the high jump,she given me some comment.Well,as what i know from today,we will be participating in high jump and long jump for girls,and high jump,long jump and triple long jump for guys.OMG!!When did i sign up for the competition?I'm happy that i can participate in high jump but i am also sad at the same time that what if i can't get into top 3?In primary and secondary school,i used to get top 1 or top 2.But when i jumped today,i feel like i can't jump very high.I'm worried! =( The competition starts next week.I have to miss lessons already.

Well,next Monday,we have another PCS online assessment test.Another test again.Test,test,test!!!So fret it out!!Hopefully during my weekends,i can study for my PCS chapter 4!

*Thinking of going to my near by house's garden to run*
*Thinking of practicing my long jump and high jump,but where to practice?who can tell me?*
*Thinking of going to my house nearby stadium to run*

2009-05-05T22:16:00.001+08:00

Should i apply for Vietnam trip?

Should i apply for NYAA?

Should i give up on Track and Fields?

Should i?

Lord,you tell me,should i or should i not?

2009-04-28T20:53:00.002+08:00

yo!I am back to blogging again.Well,today is the third week of school already.Time really flies.I missed the orientation week.It's so relaxing and fun.Though the games were abit retarded,haha!but it's really make my day fun. =) Bridge Leader!You are all the best!Thanks Ah long,Pei Rong and Kellies for bringing us around the school,teach us how to play games and etc.I really had my day! =)

Yesterday,i was having PCS online assessment test.Though it will not affect my GPA,i still feel saddness in my heart because i only got 79.6% for the test.Oh my goodness!I have to work harder le.Actually i don't really like PCS lessons because the teacher always asked us to read through the chapter before he teach us.How is it possible for us to know the chapter before hand?Well,but classes still goes on.I still have to attend.

ITE is really quite a relaxing school that i can say.haha..Not much stresssed for the moment.I guessed is because this is only the third week of school only.haha..Phew! =) The teachers are good too especially our Class Advisor!!haha..He's the best man..haha..He is an understanding man.

As for CCAs,I have joined High Jump,Track and Fields and Bridge Leader.I do not know whether do i have the ability to accomplised my task to being a student who can multi task.But i know with God with me,nothing is impossible.It might be tired but there's always a gain and a lost.I prayed hard that i will gain something out of my 3 CCAs.Atleast a medal for running and high jump.that's part of my dream. =)

2009-04-19T15:27:00.002+08:00

So fast..1week has passed.Our orientation has also passed already.Tomorrow will be the 2nd week of school already.Make quite a number of friends.Mixtures of guys and gals.

On friday,i went for my CCA(High Jump) and i realised that i am the only year 1 gal who took part in this CCA.I'm so shy.haha..There are only 4 gals in the CCA including me.As fast as i think,i make friends with them quite fast.We even relax at the food heaven for about one hour and then go home.What a tiring CCA it is but i love it.After the training,i realised that the training is tough and it's not as relax as i think.The teacher in charge said that our competition is on next month mid may.oh my gosh!So fast...As i am thinking,i am wondering should i quit and give up my favourite CCA because the training is so tough?Can i do it?Normally,in primary and secondary school,i will just went for the competition of High Jump excluding training at all.but now,it's more like professional training.Goodness!Who can guide me?Please..

As for studies,i haven started my lesson yet because books haven buy yet.I guess tomorrow will be the first lesson.Hopefully i pray that the 2 years course will not be as difficult as i think bahx..Pray hard!Everybody please pray for me..Thanks! =)

2009-04-13T21:11:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was my 20th birthday.I went to Marilyn's church and i get to know quite a friends which is from NTU,NUS,Simei ITE and NYP.They are much more friendly than what i have think of.haha..I went to Marilyn's church to watch their Easter drama.It's quite funny especially the policeman.Their height is so much different and acted not so real.But atleast i do enjoyed it.After the drama was already 3plus in the afternoon and we went outside of the church to have some buffet offered by the church.I was chit chatting with Grace,sheryl,Peici and more..They are a nice guys that i ever known of.Not even in City Harvest Church that the joy that i look for.

When i was talking to Grace,suddenly from my back,Marilyn was holding a piece of cake and a few of them sang me a "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" song.haha..I was totally shocked!haha..This all thanks to Marilyn's friends and last but not least,MARILYN!!!haha..Thanks alot.We chatted until 5plus,some of them have to went off already and only left with Marilyn,Sheryl and me.On the way to MRT station,we met some of Marilyn's cell mates and we leave together and along the way,i get to know Jinyu.She is from SIMEI ite,year 2.haha..She is very friendly and we get along quite well.

Afte that,Marilyn and i went to bugis because she said she wanted to buy a bag for my birthday present.So we went to Bugis Village and when i entered into one of the shop,one weird salesman came out and said alot of nonsense to us.From there,Marilyn bought a bag for me!haha..Thanks so much.After that,Marilyn treats me "The Spoon Soup".I drank Clam chowded soup and Marilyn drank mushroom soup.haha..It's delicious..After then,we headed to Plaza Singapura to Diaso because Marilyn wanted to buy 5 bottles for some purposes and we shopped there.Around 8plus,we went home already because we were out for quite a long time le.Both of us were tired BUT!i am happy that i have a blessed birthday!hehe..

Today is my 1st day in Simei ITE.I was having orientation today and will be going on for one week.Today,we first introduced each other to our partner and have some cheers in the indoor sports hall.After that,we headed to see who is our class advisor and introduced to our classmates.haha..our class have a big group of funnier and great laughter!haha..Followed then,we went back to indoor sports hall to play games.Though it's seems to be retarded game,but i had fun overall.haha..I ended my orientation at 4plus to 5 and i took bus 31 to tampines to find Huiping.We stayed there for awhile and met yimin and her two friends together and went off to Boon lay.We alighted at Boon lay but i have to buy dinner back for my brothers.So,i left them and left off.

Overall,it was a tiring day for me.Tomorrow,the day after tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow,i have to wake up early for orientation and attend normal lessons.Tomorrow,we will be having teambuilding and decided to join track and fields as part of my CCA.Eventhough it's really tiring,i believed that with God,nothing is impossible! =) I will prayed hard that my studies and my CCA can go smoothly.Get a GPA of 3.5 and above.I believe i can do it! =)

2009-04-03T12:37:00.002+08:00

When we are faithless,GOD will always be faithful to us.

I can tell you my story.

I took part in JAE April Higher Nitec Intake and was successfully been selected to go into Chemical Technology Course in Simei ITE.When i went to Simei ITE on 31st of Mar,i couldn't enter the course because i have drug allergic to one of the anitiboitic and was being rejected and asked me to choose another courses available.At that moment,i was feeling helpless,sad,faithless and disappointed with what the teachers said.On the spot,i have been asked to choose one of the course out of so many courses and asked me to wait for result to come out on the 3rd of April.I was really faithless and have been doubting God.Why such things happened to me?So,i have chose Business Information System Course on the spot using their computer.Huiping was there for me,she accompanied me.I left with no choice to choose a course which i am not really interested in.I am interested in Science,but life is cruel and i accepted the fate.

And today,it is 3rd of April.I have appointment with NUH in the morning.For the past few days,i couldnt sleep,play nor eat.I also don't even have the mood to sms or chat with my friends on the phone or MSN.I praise and worship God with all my heart and soul,even i cried.I was so worried that "What IF" i couldnt get into ITE?I have no plans at all.So,the cruel time comes.Before i go for appointment,i on my laptop and surf the internet on ITE website to see my result of appealing.Its said that i am successfully applied for Business Information System which is a new course in Simei ITE.I am so happy.The first thing comes to my mind is GOD.

Though i didn't attend service and cell group,God are still faithful to us.HE is always there for us.I really need to thank GOD for giving me a new chance to study.Actually HE has already given me one chance 2years ago but i chose to give up.But now,i grap the chances and use it wisely.I also need to thank Andy for praying for me on the phone while talking to him,my friends and best friends too for encouraging me not to give up.

My story tells us that no matter where we are,god is always there for us.Praise the Lord! =)

2009-03-23T18:49:00.002+08:00

为了他，我付出的还不够多吗？Why must he treat me this way?他可以为了朋友而抛弃我一个人在购物商场上。我好伤心哦，我也很气他哦！我真的真的好讨厌他但是因为我爱他，我真的不知道下一步的棋子要该这么走。他令我好好好烦哦！他说他爱我，真的吗？？令我感到好空虚。

虽然他有向我道歉，可是，抛弃我一次就有抛弃我的第二次。我已经很难再相信他所说的话了。每到旁晚七点钟，是他放工时间。我每次都会在这个时间发简讯给他，但是，今天，我优于了。我没发简讯给他因为我想要他发现没有我的简讯的日子是这样凹过去的。我在想，他会不会担心我为蛇么我没有发简讯给他呢？

天啊！我因该要这么做？爱一个人真的很辛苦。要做选择根辛苦。

希望我能收到他的简讯吧。

2009-03-20T20:49:00.002+08:00

我终于跟我的男朋友分手了。我不知为了“他”，还在想念“他”，而跟我男朋友分手了。这是不是是个好事呢？

“他”在我心里是没有人能代替的。但是，最近，我遇上了一位男生，他大我六岁，可是，他能把我的心结给打开。我好开心喔！虽然我不是完全的把“他”给忘记，可是，有他在，有他在陪我，让我决的在这个世界上我还是可以遇上我的遇中人。

他不是本地人，他来之缅甸。我不知道他是不是真的喜欢上我，可是，我需要他的时候，他却陪在我身边支持我。

好了，我去看电视了。拜拜！=）

2009-03-16T15:56:00.002+08:00

人活在世上是为了爱情还是亲情呢？活在这世上有没有意义呢？命天住定的事是没人能改变的。我好想念“他”。过了两年了，我还是无法的把“他”给忘掉。虽然我现在有了男朋友，但是，“他”的影子还是在我脑海里。

“你”在哪里？“你”现在还好吗？“你”送给我的项链，我一自都把它保管好的。“你”听着！“你”一定要好好的给我活在这个世界上。我希望我给你的美好的回忆，会带给你快乐时光。有时候，我好憎恨你，恨你放弃了这段感情，可是，我太过爱你了，爱到我无法恨你。

天啊！我到底哪里做错了？

前几天，我住进了国大医院，好邪门哦。我好像看见了你。那一可时，我有一总匆动感，想把“你”的名字给叫出来，但是，我没有。还好哦，应为那个人不是你。只是像相而已。哈哈！那一刻，我觉得我好傻哦。

说现在，我无法否认我不是不喜欢你，不爱你，但是，这对我现在的男朋友好不公平哦。所以，我下定决心在这一刻，把你给忘了。真心成义的好好去爱我的男朋友。

“你”！！！！完完全全的把“你”给忘记。

2009-01-16T15:20:00.002+08:00

hey!To all my dear friends,i am going back to malaysia tonight,10p.m bus.I will be away for roughly around one month.I will bring some goodies back if i can because my lagguage is already very heavy.haha...So don't miss me during this period of times! :P

I have already packed my bag and it's really really heavy because i bring alot of clothes back to malaysia.haha...kiasu people is like that de.bo bian...

So i will end here.See you guys in around one month times. =)

2009-01-15T00:01:00.002+08:00

Wow!Praise the Lord!I really need to thank God for giving me financial blessing. =)

The strory is like this.....
I went to POSB Bank Coin Despoit Machine to deposit some of my coins.When the machine was counting the coins,the last minutes i saw the screen was $9plus.So when i was planning to go,i must check the Eject bin to see is that any unwanted coins.So i put my hand inside and i touched that there were many many coins inside the Eject bin.I took the coins which is from Eject bin to my bank account.And when it added up,it was exactly $90plus...is like how many times is it that God have blessed me back.I tithed $9 last Sunday and i was blessed back by 10times.OMG!

With God,nothing is impossible.!PTL! =)

2009-01-12T21:58:00.002+08:00

Phew!time really flies!Today is my friends collecting their O levels results.Well,some are good as well there will be some of the bad ones.

To my friends outside,i have went through what you are going through now.My future road are more tougher than you all.So,those who get good results or bad results,let's celebrate that you all have obtained a O level certificate!Let's be positive towards our own life.

Well,i will be going back to malaysia this friday.Time really past.Now is the 12th day of year 2009.There are a greater road ahead!I will only be coming back after Chinese New Year or a few days before Chinese New Year ended.So my besties,don't missed me!I will send you a sms using my malaysia prepaid card.You can choose to or not to reply.But i'm sure my besties will reply me.haha....*So confident*.haha...

2009-01-05T20:39:00.002+08:00

wow!what a great time i didn't post my blog.Well,it's a brand new year with new revolution.I hope that i can find my Mr.Right this year so that i can spent my Valentine's day with him.hehes...

Well,i am diagnosed with another mental illness which is Boderline Personality Disorder.I undergo psychotherapy which is some sort of counselling.I'm shocked of my own illness but i need to thank god that without this illness,i doesn't know that actually my parents and friends love me so much.I need to thank them.

I must stay positive always to keep myself happy.A brand new year with brand new start. =)

So everybody out there!Stay positive always!! =) Cheers~~~

2008-10-29T20:53:00.000+08:00

You all know why i didn't update my blog?
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It's because i was hospitalised for 3 days?4days?I kena food poisoning.haha...How unlucky am i.I'm just discharged today and was on drip,so painful......but yet no one come and visit me.

EMO MOOD.

Now i'm back to blogging again.yea!During the days in hospital,i missed my hamsters soooo much.I am wondering should i buy a dog?I met a aunty who slept next to me in hospital told me that they just bought the dog online that only cost them $300!Wow!!Outside you can't find such a price lorx....So it tempted me alot..haha..

The aunty that slept next to me actually just live nearby me only.Juz one street away.haha..so coincidence.So i asked her one question:"Why you choose Alexandra Hospital and not NUH?".You all know why i asked her this question?I'm curious that NUH is the nearest hospital than Alexandra Hospital.She answered that the nurse services is very good.Indeed,she is right.

NUH take a longer time to attend to call bell than AH which attend to call bell immediatly.Patients no need to wait.haha..I'm stupid to ask such question right?Then the aunty asked me back the same question and i say it's the same answer as hers.haha..Well,eating depression medicines do help me?I duno la..haha..

Back to EMO mood.

2008-10-25T00:17:00.000+08:00

Yea!I went to buy Viewty hp today.I change phone le.I guess this phone will use me for years....I won't change this phone because this is my only precious and lovely hp that i always wanted to buy for.Finally my plan ended.Yea!Though it cost me a bomb!But,i'm happy with it.I'm not a rich gal,but i will buy things that i love.The phone can stand for 4GB,but they only give 1GB,so i bought the 4GB memory stick that cost me $48.I trade in my phone that cost me $80 and i buy the phone that cost me $188.So in total i spend $156.Wow!!!Nevermind.Once in a while.I shouldn't buy 4GB memory stick lor,so stupid me lor...Maybe i'm in a rush bahx..haix...

Then my parents and my youngest brother went to temple because is duno which god's birthday.So i went.I didn't hold the joss stick but suppose to.I just followed what they do and in the end,we went to have our lucky red eggs.My dad still brought a few eggs back.haha..so kia shu.I saw Pei Qing shi jie,long time didn't really chat with her ler.Miss the first time when i talk to her.haix..How i wish i got the time and she also got the time to chat with me.I really need someone to talk to,if not,i will really depressed and live in my own world again.I'm really tired...

2008-10-22T14:54:00.000+08:00

I went to see Esther this morning but i was late for the appointment.Luckily she's still waiting for me.After all,I'm still depressed but i do not know what i am depressed about.After what Esther had told me,i should take the first step out.If not,no one willing to take the first step out.But why me?

Well,i will think about it.So i reached home at about 2.30p.m.My dad and my brother is at home.Why must things be so complicated?Did i make it so complicated or it's already complicated?haix...I didn't cry infront of Esther,i thought i will cry but i didn't.I do not know why i couldn't cry infront of her but for Su Ren,i can.Why?

I try to accept that i no longer seeing Su Ren already and accept Esther as my counsellor,but some how,there's still a gap between her and me.Su Ren is a nice girl,a good counsellor but she's no longer a counsellor.As for Esther,i still seeing her once two weeks.How i wish Su Ren never been transfer to another department.But nevermind.I will try my best to adapt the environment together with Esther.I will cooperate with her.

Things doesn't seems to be complicated with god.With God,nothing is impossible.Continue to draw,listen to music and talk to my friends.But where is all my friends?I shall talk to my hamsters then.haha...I'm crazy already.Nevermind.Well,i'm going to have my nap.bye! =)

2008-10-14T22:30:00.000+08:00

I'm back from work again.It's a brand new week again.Well,there are 52weeks in a year and this 52 weeks are our brand new week each.

Today i was late for work due to i went out of my house late.I was bathing my hamsters,my mickey and minnie.It's so troublesome to bathe them.I use sand bath.I didn't use shampoo because i scare they are not used to water.

I reached my workplace at about 3.30p.m,i didn't even settled down and have to teach the kids how to find the CDs for listening,oral and etc...Wow!!Today's time passed really fast for me.Then i went home after that.I was damn hungry because i only ate bread before i went for work.haha..

I miss my hamsters while working.I couldn't really put them aside and don't care about them.I love playing with them.hehes...Finally i have pet!But is a small tiny pet la.How i wish i can have a puppy.Well,I am sure i can have a puppy at home one day when i grow up. =) Look on the bright side,right?Erm....I'm thinking of buying another two more hamsters,one male,one female,same breed lehx...haha...i think i going to buy..let's have four hamsters....hehes..And well,my spect are ready for collection!!!

I bought a white half spect...I think it will look nice on me..haha!!!!I'll take picture of the spect before i wear it.hehe...i have one spare spect already....yea!!Guess this will be the last spect i'm changing...hehez... :P

2008-10-12T20:25:00.001+08:00

Wow!!Wow!!I was so tired yesterday.I met Huiyee at Lakeside Mrt station and we went to Jurong West St51 there to have our lunch.After that,we went into a Spectacles shop and buy spects.We bought the same design but different colour.I bought a white one.hehes...

Then we went to flea market to see whether is they selling hamsters or not.They did sell but it's not nice and only left with one or two hamsters left so i only bought their bedding and food stuff.

Next stop we went straight was Vivo City.We went to Pet Lovers Centre to puchase my 2 hamsters and Huiyee's dog foods and toys.We spent from 6plus till they closed their shop.haha...There are some nice dogs....Can you imagine we spent so long inside a shop?Haa..guess how much we spent in total for the whole day including our spects?I guessed it's $400plus in total.

Below are the pictures of the dogs and the hamsters cage that i have bought for them.

This dog named Samoyed!Haha..Cute right?
This is my hamsters cage.Nice? The hamsters is Pearl Winter White in breed. =)

Below are our own picture...

Huiyee and me. =)

After the shop closed,it's about 10plus already.But we didn't go home straight.We sat outside the arcade and chit chat for awhile before we went home.Huiyee bought her dinner at Vivo.Wow!It's heavy.

Below is the picture of how many bags we have bought for our pet.

Can you see how heavy it is for us to carry home?haha..

Huiyee still plan to take cab home.haha...But i told her to save money.Really right?Each of us have nearly spent $200 on spects and pet's stuff.haha..so i told her not to take cab.must tahan!haha...So we went home at around 11plus.We took the last train home back to Boon lay.It's was tiring.When i came back home,i prepare for my hamsters's food and water for them and let them to have a good rest too. =)

Today i couldn't wake up to go for service.I was extremely tired.I slept at 1a.m and due to my medicines,it's too heavy for me to wake up in the late morning.I woke up at 1p.m.Play with my hamsters for awhile and went back to sleep again at around 3p.m.Well,i woke up and sleep and woke up again.Until 8p.m then i really woke up.haha...maybe i am really a pig.Piggy...haha...

2008-10-08T22:40:00.000+08:00

Yo!Today i have a great day together shopping with my two besties!!They are Melissa and Judy!!~~Yoyo,what's up man~~...haha...I met Melissa at Boon lay Mrt at 2p.m then we head to Orchard to meet Judy but she's late due to playing too much MSN!!Hor!!!Nevermind..Melissa and I head to Sony Style main store to purchase my USB cable but the man said it's out of stock,nevermind.I ask him how much does it cost,he said $70plus.WOW!!!!!Then he said i might as well purchase the card reader.After finished asking him,Mel and I waited for Judy at the store.Just awhile,she came already,then we head to Best Denki to buy my card reader.$15 lei!!Haix..who asked me to lost the cable...too bad lor...*Slap myself*

Followed by that,Mel and I already had our lunch and breakfast except Judy.So we decided to go to Tonkichi to have some snacks,lunch break tea as well as accompany Judy to have her lunch.

There you go of those pictures of us having our food that we had odered>>>

ME having the Menu...

That's Mel covered her face!!haha!! This is Judy!She work at Tonkichi.

These are all the food we had for our lunch tea break.We shared money to eat..

Delicious?Wana eat??haha...

After eating,here is the end of our lunch>>>>

Mel looking at the menu for ice-cream!!Yummy~~

Our next destination is Takashimaya shopping centre.Espirit has mega sales!!Mel bought one clothes that that will be her first time wearing it.haha!!Mel's bf,your gf is going to change to ladies type ler.haha...We are heading down the escalator and Judy took picture of Mel and me.

After shopping at Taka...we headed towards Cineleisure and i bought one tube in my life.haha...

Look more like skirt right?haha!!Cost me $20plus...

And that's all!!End of our day trip at Orchard and Cineleisure.Then we took bus 174 back to Jurong.Mel and Judy alight at their stop and me went to Jurong Point to take something from Mervin and as well as deposit the left over money to buy my hamsters.haha....The bus was very crowded lorx...we stood all the way till jurong.Can you see how strong is our leg or not..haha..lol...

Good Night! =) Have a great day tonight!I LOVE IT... =)

2008-09-30T22:26:00.000+08:00

Yo!!I just came back from Malaysia.it's a happy trip over there.I miss my aunt and all the little cuties children alot....hees...My aunty cooked alot of my favourite dishes,like chili crab,prawns,lala and more...Wow!!!Delicious man...I love it..hees...I ate supper too like the famous satay and the famous fried kway teow.Nice lehx...Eat until my tummy become bigger and bigger.haha..Because i only eat sleep eat sleep...hees...I bought some cuttlefish back for my bestfriend.She said she wanna eat cuttlefish so i ask my aunt to give me some.I guess it's enough for her.haha..I tried the cuttlefish,it's nice,got sugar one..I went shopping with my aunt and aunty too..hees..Now i'm back on mission.Work Work Work again...haix...That's called life that's never end.

Below are my cuties little children....
Cute right??haha!!!

Ya,i forgot one thing.I highlight my hair but the colour not very bright.I think cannot attract people attention.haha..very cheap only lehx..of cuz is FOC!!Free Of Charge.haha..only RM35.My aunt treat me.hees....

2008-09-18T21:33:00.000+08:00

wow!What a long time i didn't update my blog le.Gonna become a rotting blog le.hahax...Well,i have been busy with my work at kumon which is located at Pasir Panjang.WooooW!!!That's far right?I think so too.I always take bus 30 and nearly take me one hour bus travelling time.Gosh!!The working timing is also very short only.1 day i can only earn $20.Can u imagine?Working for 4hours only.Well,i shouldn't complain.It's much more better that there's a job than jobless,right?

I really urge to have money.I'm seeing my counsellor every week and my psychiartric doctor every 3weeks and others doctor.I'm owing IMH and NUH money lor...it's not 1 or 2 digits numbers,it's a 3 to 4 digits numbers.Gosh!!god!!Help me....I'm stuck!Well,i will be going back to malaysia this coming Saturday.I will only be going back for 1week to settle something personal there as well as going for relaxation.

Well,there's something i have to speak up for myself here in blog.In our cell group,there's a girl who is younger than me called me to go for service and cell group.I didn't go cell group because i need to work until 7p.m and by the time i reach there,the cell group will be ended.Nevermind.I promise her that i will go for service for the past few weeks but in the end,i broke my promises.I didn't go because i come out with an excuses that i am very tired.Well,do you all know that a person suffer from mental illness is a very tiring thing?Plus,we are under medications,we have to use brain to think every single day.How tired are we compared to those who are totally healthy?

I apologised to her already and i told her that i will go for this coming service,but too bad,i'm going back to malaysia.Well,i didn't mean to make things worst and i didn't expect that we actually quarrelled over the phone.How am i going to face her in cell group?or service?What should i said to her?will she forgive me?See?I admit that i am in the wrong to make promises to her but i didn't turn up and she waited for me week past week.Maybe before i go back to malaysia,i should give her a call first to explain to her.

Haix...tomorrow still have to wake up and go for work.chiong arhx!!!!!hahax...

2008-08-23T21:51:00.000+08:00

hello!I'm back to blogging again.So sorry that i didn't blog any post for the past few weeks?I'm busying hunting for jobs.haha!!Well,they always said wait for calls but none of them had called me up.See?When i told them that i suffer from an illness,i guessed 95% of them won't dare to hire me.If you were the boss,will you hire me?I'm really rather quite disappointed with god.I fast,i pray,i praise and worship him,but then?What did i get in the end?Financial problem,health problems,family problems,studies problem and etc...Why?What have i done wrong?I have already fast for two weeks but there's no news of my job.I'm really depressed and desperate for a job.Can you imagine i've owed hospital $6000 cash?!!!Crazy right?How am i going to pay the amount of money?Depend on my parents?Wait long long.

Next week,i have three medical appointment to go to.I do not know how and where to get the money from.What my mum earned is already not enough for what she spent,how can she provide me with the money?Depends on my dad alone?How much can he give?Three appointments!!!Not one appointment...Medical fees has increased too.Wah lao!I gonna die soon...haix..I fast and i have totally lost 2kg,what more does god want?God ah God!!!Please help me...I need your financially help,physically help,mentally and even emotionally help too.God,i believe you have heard my prayer.I believed in you,i have faith in you.Maybe you are testing how much faith i have in you.You said in you bible,you just need our faith is like a mustard seed to move a mountain.I still believing in you.Keep on and keeping on.

Today,i went for another interview at Bukit Batok East hunting for job with Yimin.It's a kumon job i'm looking for.How i wish i can work at kumon again.I missed kumon very much.Especially the kids.Three cutie memorable kids that i ever have missed.Today i overslept.I suppose to meet Yimin at 9a.m but i slpet until 9.25a.m.I quickly brushed up and met her under her block.Bo bian,we have to took cab down.Then hor!!Funny part is here that Yimin didn't hired a $2.80 comfort cab for me,instead,she hired a $3 comfort cab for me lehx...Yimin hor!!!I lecture her already...hahaha...Paisei,just joking.I just talked to her.Yimin,don't take it too hard hor...joking only arhx...hahax...Then i went for the interview.It was a woman.Thank God this time.The kumon's instructor at bukit batok east said that she had to arrange with the teachers timing and i can only go to work on Sept.OMG!!Sept?Haix..Hope she will call me up.God bless me.

Then we went to Westmall for shopping.haha...We shopped for around 3-4hours.You know what we do there?Yimin bought a brown colour bag for me at the yellow shop as my birthday present!!So nice of her...heeess....Then she very bad lehx.She asked me to treat her back.haha...Since she want,then i treat her subway lor.Atleast i still can afford to treat her this meal.It's not expensive though.As for my bestfriend's birthday,it should be a expensive meal but i have find a job yet.Get me crazy!!!!!!!!

After that,i went home quickly to have a quick bathe to meet my friends.But in the end,they paiseh me.Said rain heavily,cannot come out of the house,bring umbrella look weird etc etc.All the excusess....Nevermind.I shall not hold grudges on him.Then i called Mel out to go shopping at Jurong Point.Both of us bought a high heel shoes.haha...We wanna become a "woman" and not a "girl" anymore.haha...no la..kidding.See,now i still have the time to joke.Well,I'm damn broke already.I do not know how to handle next week appointments.Who can offer help me financially?Who can bless me?Haix...What way can i find?Gosh!

Well,hope everything will go find for me.....

2008-08-16T21:18:00.000+08:00

Haix...Ever since long time i never update was because i was working.But now,i was sacked by my boss.He said that my marking speed does not met his expectation.Well,like my friend said,if the boss don't like you,he/she will used many excuses to sack you.I agreed with what my friend had said.Please,i hope my previous boss is not that kind of boss like what my friend had said.

Well,i'm kinder upset and moody.I'm jobless for 2weeks plus already.I wanted to find job as soon as possible because i one of my bestfriend's birthday is coming up and i still owe one of my bestfriend's birthday treat.OMG!!!God...help me...I'm an utterly failure.I can't make it for studies,forget it.Now,i can't even make it for my job.How cruel is this world?Where is all my friends when i need them?Where?

Thanks God that i still have Jia Qi with me.She consulted me,pray for me through the phone this few days.If not,i do not know how am i going to pull through.Most of all,i still have God.Nothing is impossible with god around.Jia You!

2008-07-31T22:15:00.000+08:00

Wow!It had been a great time i didn't update my blog already.I guess if i don't continue to update,this blog will become a trash.haha...Well,the reason why i didn't update my blog is because i don't have the time.i have been working on Mon,Tues,Thurs and Sat.Fri and Sun is for CG.So i only left with Wed to rest.OMG!!!hahax..But i didn't complain...Okay!!

Well,i get to work in kumon tuition centre and i realised that every month of the fifth week,there won't be any tuition classes.OMG!!!So,this whole week i'm not working till tomorrow.Saturday i have to go back work again.STRESS!!!haha...but all the kids are cute...cuites...hees..I didn't have the chance to take pictures with them.haha...

So,i rest at home the whole day,sleep the whole day and eat the whole day.Stomach getting bigger and bigger.haha...gosh!!hees...don't laugh at me worx...

I share something with you guys.Though i can't get to have testimonies time,i will share it here.
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Last Saturday,while working,suddenly,i don't know why,my boss,Sam,asked me to help 'tong shi' to buy lunch and gave me $20.So i went to gek poh shopping centre food court to buy duck rice first.Followed by that,i went to Handmade Noodle to buy food and then,i realised that i lost $10.I left with $3.20,supposely i should left with $13.20,but i dropped the $10.i don't know why and i was extremely panic.I called Yvonne to bring my purse down for me but many students are asking her for help,so she can't come down.I called back home,my brothers do not have enough money.So i thought is the end of the world.So i called Sam and told him that i have lost the $10 that he gave and he asked me to go back to centre first.But,somehow,a strong feeling telling me not to go back first.There will have another solution.So i think and think!!!Jie Ling!She worked at Gek Poh Prime Supermarket.I gave her a called and asked her,and she said that she have $10 with her.wow!!!I met her and collect the money.This time round,i must really thank god for his mercy and saviour.Hallelujah!!Amen!Praise the lord!I think god wanted to test me how much faith i have in him when i need help.Amen!!!!So i bought all the food and drinks back to the centre and i realised one thing!I forgot to buy one more duck rice for Yijia!!!OMG!!How bluurrr and clumsy am i.So i kept apologised to her.So sorry Yijia....NExt time i will remember to buy your share one.REMEMBERED!!haha...
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So,in conclusion,next time becareful of handling money.haha....I won't be so bluurr and clumsy next time already.haha...is quite a bad memories for me.But no matter what,god is a good god!!Praise the Lord!

2008-07-08T23:58:00.000+08:00

Many people asked me how's my new job?Well,i work in Kumon tuition centre as a marker which help students to mark their worksheets.Don't you ever look down on this job!It's tough,ok!!!haha...Though it's just sitting down and mark worksheets but it really take time and effort to mark faster.What counts is SPEED!!!!

I must learn how to mark faster already..haha...I become a teacher already.The students are so cute lorx..call me teacher teacher.haha...I like this job quite much larhx...though is so stressful.Our tuition centre will not be opening everyday.Will only open on Mon,Tuesday,Thursday and Satuday.Thanks God!!!I can attend CG and SVC lerx...haha...i think this job is bless by god!!!!Thanks lord... =)

Fast as i think.Time really flies while working because students keep coming.haha...But nevermind.Next time i should bring some sweets and give it to them.hees...I think i will only work until Jan 09.I will be going back to Malaysia to celebrate CNY!!!!Chinese New Year!!!Yea!!Time really flies...haha....k la...i go and sleep lerx...

2008-07-06T23:53:00.000+08:00

Today,i woke up late but not as late as before.I met Huiching,Felicia and Huiping under their block.Just a street across us.hahax...so we went to Blk 815 to eat breakfast though we are already late.haha...then we rush to city harvest church which is at jurong west.

Today is a very special service,which is Mike Connell.He is always the one who do the deliverance service.haha...So,i can't get what Mike Connell waa saying because his talking was too fast like a train.haha..But atleast i get it abit.It's quite funny.hahax...

After awhile,the deliverance start already.Today is about....eh...i forgot already.omg!!!I have STM...cham liao larhx...hahax....I think should be about dissapointment in life?Am i right?Must correct me..cannot anyhow say de...haha...I almost went for the delieverance but i didn't.i did cry,i duno why lei..automatically tears flow down... =(

Then we went to the same same same,everytime the same kopitiam(sianx) which is located just opposite of CHC only.I ate duck rice.There's nothing to eat de...Then around 5p.m we went to Jurong Point.All the sisters took ken's car and poor thing,all the brothers take bus to Jurong Point.Due to i need to meet my bf,i only take ken's car till jurong point because i meet him at boon lay interchange.I still late lei...i'm so sorry...not purposely one...Then we shop awhile and i home sweet home.

Tomorrow will be my dead time.gosh!!!I start work tomorrow at 2p.m at Gek Poh CC.2-9p.m.That's a long time but better than popular bookstore.hees..office work..i love it!!Pray hard that god will bless me not only physically bUT!emotionally and mentally.Work must use brain and energyPray hard.....!!!!.

2008-07-06T00:30:00.004+08:00

What am i going to do??Gosh!!Yesterday,i received a called from the Gek Poh CC asking me to go for the job.Wah..Thanks god!God is a good god!!!Finally i believe that...I'm so happy.Monday i have to work already.Pray hard everything will goes well...

I took Ron to cell group yesterday and finally,he decided to become a pure christian.i'm so happy...!!!!And i went out with him today to watch Kunfu Panda and then i gave him a surprise when i meet him.I bought a cross for him and he wear it.hees...Today,finally!!he send me home....sooo good of him...jia you for work!!Ok??

我是你的天空。我好爱你哦。。。。希望我们能永远在一起，永不分开。。你呢？

That's when i love you

When you have to look away
When you dont have much to say
That's when i love u I love u just that way
To hear u stumble when u speak
Or see you walk with two left feet
That's when i love you I love u endlessly

And when you're mad cuz you lost a game
Forget im waitin in the rain Baby i love you
I love you anyway
So here's my promise made tonite
You can count on me for life
Cuz thats when i love you

When nothin u do could change my mind
The more i learn The more i love
The more my heart cant get enough
That's when i love you
When i love you no matter what
So when you turn to hide ur eyes

Cuz the movie it made u cry
That's when i love u i love u a lil more each time
And when u cant quite match ur clothes
Or when u laugh at ur own jokes
That's when i love u I love u more than you'll know
And when u forget that we had a date

Or that look that u get when u show up late
Baby i love u I love u anyway
So here's my promise made tonite
You can count on me for life
Cuz thats when i love u
When nothin u do can change my mind

The more i learn the more i love
The more my heart cant get enough
Thats when i love u i love u no matter what
Thats when i love u
When nothin baby
Nothin u do can change my mind

The more i learn
The more i love
The more my heart cant get enough
Thats when i love u when i love u
No matter what No matter what

2008-07-03T22:46:00.000+08:00

Today i went for job hunt again.Well,it didn't seems to go well.But nevermind.i will never give up.After that,i went to meet Ronnald again.Meet him and i was always late.haha...he has to wait for me.So sorry.haha...Then i meet him at Tiong Bahru and we went to Vivo City again.This time round,we went there is to take more pictures.hahax...But firstly,i went to Kopitiam to eat first and Ronnald bought me watermelon juice for me.So sweet of him..hees...

After that,we went to the most upper level to take some pictures...

I love the sea breeze...So nice a view..............

We took pictures at Outram Park while waiting for the train to come towards Harbourfront.hees...We take the pictures using my latest digital camera lei...

It's hard to take pictures myself using digital camera but i did it!!!yea!!Though it's not so photographic,Paisei larhx...haha...After that,we went to pet shop to take a look at pet.so cute of them....hees...I wanna buy them....wow!!!!haha...

After that,we took bus 30 home.Finally,i can lie on my dear dear Ronnald shoulder already and i really fallen asleep.OMG!!!!!haha...but luckily i woke up on time.hees...Then he only can send me to jurong point. =( I thought he can send me back home.How i wish he can send me home everyday.Nevermind.Da ren you da liang.Forget it.And so,i saw a sleeping shirt which is very cute.But no $$ to buy.haiz...dunno how much sia...How i wish someone can buy for me.Nevermind bahx...Well,i going to sleep now.Good night!! =)

2008-07-02T22:35:00.000+08:00

Today,i went for job hunt again.haix...when can i get job?please god!!Provide me a job...Well,i will never give up.I will continue to go for job hunt.Never give up and nothing is impossible in this world!!!

I went to meet Andy at Boon lay interchange in the afternoon.I went for the first interview which is at Alexandra Road.It's tough to find the location.There are pictures to show how scary it is and found something very interesting.Well,i called that person up and he told me that i can take 143,10 or 30 bus.So we went to harbour front which was told by that person and take a either of the bus there.So,when we reach there,i saw bus 30,10 and 143,the bus captain said there's no such road as Boon Leat Road.

They heard as Boon Lay.haix..hard to communicate with them.haha...So Andy and i went to see the bus directory.While looking at the bus directory,suddenly one person popped out!Got me a shocked man..you know who is it?It was Huijuan.haha...She went to Vivo City to collect her lap top.Chey!!When we looked at the bus directory,actually 143,30 and 10 can board the bus.Chey!!Don't know means don't know larhx...aiyo...Then we went to take 143 bus.When we reach there....You will see below...

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The interview place was just beside harbourside2.

And here is the building!!OCS!!!!!Finally found you..my darling...Andy said it was an amzaing race to find a place...so challenging...hees....love it man!!

When i went into the building,i found something very interesting.The lift.Like the olden days lift.hahax...seee>>>

And when we went up,the place is already an office...!!!
Here is the office...there you go...hahax...Small office right?Opps...actually cannot take picture one...shhh...haha...

Then Andy accompany me to Tanjong Pagar to fill up another application form which is at B1-04,bread shop.I must thanks him so much for accompany me for almost more than half a day.Actually we planned to take 51 back to jurong east but we didn't see the bus coming.So we missed the bus and while waiting,Andy told me that actually 143 also can take back to jurong east.So ok lorhx.But!One thing bad about 143 was that the bus took a longer route than what 51 bus route was taken.argh!!I sat until my buttock was so painful.argh!!!Stay inside the bus for one hour..can u imagine?

I met Ronnald again to ask him to accompany me to find job again.haha..Suppose to meet him 3p.m but in the end i met him at 5p.m.So sorry for waiting.Supposingly,i have another interview at 4p.m but i only reached jurong east at 5p.m.So i called the woman back.She scolded me that "are you serious with this job?" and i said "yes,i do",and she asked me to go for interview tomorrow at 9.30a.m.Crazy arh?!!!Purposely wanna make me one lor..i don't care..i'm not going for the interview.I might not be the successful candidates for the job.No garauntee!!!

To prove to the woman that i am serious with the job,i asked Ronnald to accompany for the interview.The woman said that take "Jurong East interchange 78 bus,11th bus stop alight and walk on the left hand side,the first unit".So i went according to the instruction.When i went,i went to the wrong company.In the end,the company is Unit 16 and not Unit 20.But i damn luckly lei...I went to the wrong unit but just nice,the company also want to hire people for work.So Ronnald and i have a short chit chat with the boss and in the end,i as well apply for the hob there.Is a full time job.He might hired me.I'm not sure larhx...Abit happy.I believed that it's god who wants me to meet the boss for this job.Though there's no air con,but the boss is nice.I pray hard that i can take the job.Pray hard!!!!

After that,actually i plan to go and search for Unit 20 but it's raining.Then we didn't went for the search and decided to go to IMM for dinner.Roughly we reached IMM was already 7 to 8p.m.After eating,was already 8plus.haiz..so sad.How i wish he can send me home.Atleast he can lend his shoulder for me to sleep.But nevermind,he didn't send me home in the end.Abit upset.Forget it...99 bus came and i board the bus alone.So i decided to call my friend out for a drink nearby jurong west st 40plus...and i reached home at around 9plus to 10p.m.

Now,home sweet home....and sleep.hahax...Continue job hunt tomorrow.hahax...

2008-07-01T23:11:00.000+08:00

Yoz!!Today i went for job hunt again...I met huiping under her block and she accompany me for the interview at tampiner.That's faaaarrrrr!!!!!haha...ya...dat's far...but,we still went there.I almost got the job already but...because of time restriction,they need to call the company up to see whether can be discussed or not.I pray hard that it can be discussed.haiz...Pray!!!!!Pray!!!!!

After that,i went to meet Ronnald at Redhill Mrt Station.So sorry larhx...i ps huiping,asked her to go home alone.Next time won't ps you ler...hees...Then i decided not to find any job le because it's too sick and tired to find so many jobs per day.haiz..everybody just said "wait for calls".What the hell is it...Then i decided to go to Vivo City to shop...hahax...So i went with Ronnald.We went for a walk and bought a jacket and chocolate.Ron paid for it.Thanks so much..Love ya so much...hees...Here we took so of the pictures below.

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And i also take one picture of the nitex vivo city display crafture.

After that,we went home.In fact,i expected him to send me home but...due to personal reason(i cannot tell),we have to go home by ourself.I reached home at about 10.30p.m.What a tired day i had today.But it's fun too going out with Ronnald.hees....(You know i know can already-->Ronnald)

Gd nitex!

2008-06-26T21:01:00.000+08:00

This is the overhead bridge that i have to take to work every single day.

I work at SIM University but i have already quit the job due to some of the personal reason.haix...Actually i like to work at popular but i don't like to work at SIM University popular.I will no longer walk on this bridge anymore.Now,i'm jobless again and are searching for job now.JOB HUNT!!!hahax...

Today,i went out with my dear dear Jeffrey.I meet him at Boon Lay Interchange because he was meeting one of the country golf club boss for work interview.I tell you all something.It's not that you have higher qualification,you can get a job asap because my dear dear Jeffrey only studied until PSLE level and yet he can get a $1600/mth job.Well guys,yet me,i still hunting for job not as easy as how my dear dear get his job.

God!!Bless me with a job.I don't want to stay at home doing nothing because my depression will be even become worst.I don't want that to happen to me....God,God!!

2008-06-21T12:26:00.001+08:00

Yo!!I'm back to blogging again..today suppose to work but i overslept.die arhx..on Mon..lucky my supervisor off on Mon..atleast can cover my off duty work..haha...Today our Popular will open till 2.30p.m only...then..close!!!But non of my business..haha..Monday have to work again..i will only off every thursday because of my medical appointment larhx...Then i can't off on friday already,can't go cell group too...haix...abit upset but i will try my best to arrange my timing de...

Yesterday,RMIT school will be starting school soon...So,quite alot of student came to buy books.i help them to find the books dat they want.Iffah and lay lay was at the cashiering counter.At the end of day,you know what?Lay Lay shocked us out man!She said that we short of $10!!!!!!But after checking and checking,chey!!Is we have extra cash..extra of $10...haha...Shocked us out lorx..nevermind...cute lor..lay lay...she is good!She taught me how to use the PDA to return stock.hees...

At the end of day,i went home after that and i reached hom at about 9plus.that's why i can't wake up today.haha...shhhh.....it's fun to work at popular shop as sales assistant.it's not fun to work as cashier because every single cents you have short,you have to pay!!Even 10cents...unless you come out from your own pocket larhx...haha...stress lei..!!!So i try not to touch the cashiering as much as i can.haha...but i still have to learn in the end...lolxx...

2008-06-14T21:22:00.000+08:00

Today i woke up at 10plus in the morning preparing myself to go to Jurong West Blk492,7 Eleven for interview.Oh my goodness!!Their pay is damn low lorx...Work as a part time,their pay is $3.50/hr.How can it be?But,nevermind.If successful in working in 7 Eleven,then i work lor.Better than no job at all...Am i right?Today after interview,i went back home.

So,today i stay at home the whole day.It makes me feel puke man...*fainting* Then my mum went to courts to collect Sony Digital Camera for me.She bought for me but we hacing cold war for don't know how many days already.The camera is quite nice.The model is T300,black in colour.I will be bringing my camera to church tomorrow to take pictures.haha...

Can i wake up early tomorrow??for church?Must meet someone...then i can wake up early already....haha...k lahx..that's it for today....must sleep early...hees....

2008-06-13T20:26:00.001+08:00

Terence met me at the Boon Lay platform and we went to IT Fair because his cousin and him wanna buy laptop.You know what?Yesterday IT fair was the first day of the fair and there wasn't much people.Though is crowded,but not as crowded as the past that used to be.Maybe because of the economics that everything are increasing but salary is not increasing.Well,i saw my MP4 and actually i wanna buy it but after what Terence advised me,i think i better buy Sony PSP.haha....

After going to I.T fair,we went to Marina Square to have our dinner.We went to Han's to eat.He treat me...haha...Gentleman..good!!haha...Then we chat while having dinner and quite happy to went out with him.After that,we went to Sony shop but it's closed!!!Idoitic lei...Then i told Terence that he must buy me a jacket as a gift because at that moment i was so cold.haha...

Followed by that,Terence went to find his friend at Pasir Ris and i went home after that.Actually i found a job already but i didn't turn up for that job..haha..because i was so tired that i overslept!!!!Nervermind..Old never goes,new never comes...haha...

Today,i received called from 7 Eleven.She asked me to go fo interview tomorrow at Jurong West block 492.Though the salary is very low,but better than nothing...u know?haha..right?So tomorrow i must wake up on time for my interview.hope i can start work immediatly....Pray!!!!

Then i met Jeffery and asked him to accompany to South West CDC to find job.And exactly!!!I called them and get some response from them.They said they will called me next week,asked me to wait for their calls.haha...I'm very confused.If i really can't find any job,i think i will be going back to m'sia for holiday le.haha..God arhx..Pray hard...have faith in him that i will find the right job.Hope the 7Eleven job can allow me to go to church on Sunday.Pray,pray,pray....

After that,we went to IMM to shop.I went to Giant to find back my colleagues and only saw a few of them.Somemore,i heard some shock news larhx...Unbelievable lei..How come she become like that?Gosh!!Then we home sweet home... =)

2008-06-10T21:11:00.000+08:00

haiz...i'm so tired!!!!!!I having been sleeping well for the past few days...looking for jobs and going for my medical appointment.wah!!!Siong arhx...worst if i still studying in poly.i think i have made the right choice to quit school for the moment.*phew*

Days after days,i still couldn't find a job.Even i found a job,i can't work because i have to attend service on Sunday.oh my goddness!!How??!!!!I can't find a job because i have to attend church and cell group.arh!!!it's makes me crazy....how??I don't even know i should find a full time or a part time job.Full time,i can't make it for svc and cg,part time,no one wants.

Today,i went to see my dental doctor in the morning.After that,i went to look for job from east to west,west to east and went to IMM to look for job.Actually i wanted to applied job at Giant but i see them all so busy and i got stress up again.Since then,i decided not to apply job at giant.But if i really never receive any call from anyone,i guess i will be going to pioneer mall giant to apply for job already.haha....Today was damn tired!!!Ya hor!I saw one girl that is farmiliar at F.O.S.But i just can't remember who is it.hahax...nevermind.

Well,tomorrow is another day.I have to find job again. =( God ah!!I pray hard that i can get a job at IMM.Pray hard....Well,it's day for me to sleep already.good nitex... =)

2008-06-04T21:24:00.000+08:00

I'm not feeling quite well this few days,especially today.I don't know what's wrong with me.haix...I have no mood to do anything or going any where.Why god must make fun of me?Why??!!!!! =(

Forget it...i don't feel like blogging today....

2008-06-03T23:28:00.000+08:00

(1 June,Sunday)

I went to church on Sunday alone.I woke up late again and have to rush to church because i don't want to miss the praise and worship part.When i reached,i called ken,aziel and etc and you know!No one answer my call...so poor thing.So i called Kok khuen and then i knew that oh...!!!he is even later than me.haha..So i waited for him at the main lobby.While waiting for him,i'm afraid that i have no seat at all so i called Huiching up.I asked her to come up to main lobby to accompany me to wait for Kok khuen to come and as well as to see her because i didn't get to see Huiching for quite a very very very long time.Didn't i expect,not only Huiching came up,Felicia came up too.I'm so surprised.haha...But glad to see them.. =) *cheers*

During the service,Pastor Tan was preaching.It was a good message for that day but for me,i didn't even catch a single word from him.hahas...At first,the first part of his starting message,i understood but followed by,i don't even catch a word already.I'm lost!!!How??!!!Oh my Goddness....Aiyo..After that,i went to find karen and told her that i would like to be a cell group helper and also would like to serve CCH but too bad.I missed out the most important thing,which is the attendance.I didn't attend CG and SVC for quite a long time,roughly 1months plus....Nevermind!Still can catch up and continue.Stand up again and start to cycle.Yea!!Encouragement from God!! =)

After that,i went to church nearby coffee shop to find ken and others cell members.We were having our lunch there.Some of them leave earlier and left Ken and me.Ken was waiting for Joshua and as for me,i was waiting for Huiching they all.They were having mass bible study and waited for them for 1hour.*Rot*...Thanks god!!I didn't wait for long....*Phew*....Next,i waited for Yimin,Felicia and Huiching to finish their lunch and we sent Dennis to the bus stop.After that,we went back to the church cafe to study.Not me who study but it's Yimin,Felicia and Huiching who are preparing for their 'O's level...Jia you!!!I believe you all can do it....

Next,we went to Jurong Point at around 8plus.We wnet to Mcdonal to chit chat till 9plus and we went home.While on the way home,we took 242 rounding..and what i hate most was!!!!!They all said i am slow,like a robort...*Sad*...I'm not slow okay!!It;s due to the medicine that i am taking everyday....please understand me.... =)

(2-3 June,Mon and Tues)

I went to school again.A new week for me...but,the course is very stressful that i can't even cope.On tuesday,i went to find my school counsellor.She told me something that i'm very upset of because is something that is unexpected.I am having too many MCs and they are going to debar me from taking my test and exams.So my counsellor advise me to quit school and go to work first,follow by going to higher nitec then to poly.Well,the road is long and tough,but i believe that with god,everything is possiblel..

So from now,i will be working and treating this year like my BIG holidays.Well,i can't predict what's happen next or neither can i know my destiny.Only God knows.....I will miss my classsmates alot...Though they didn't now that i'm quitting school,but i hope that they can be able to catch up with the work.Good luck to you all!! =)

Well,things do happen every single day.Last time,i used to have a company who i can talk to every single day about my problem.But after she knew that i am suffering from depression,she started not to talk to me about her problem or even share her problem with me.She have changed!She is swerving god but she is serving because she need to serve and not want to serve.What's that a need for?What for she angry wif her?What can she do?hsiz....really unpredicatable....

2008-05-21T23:05:00.000+08:00

Day after day,i didn't received his email already.haiz...It have been days i'm waiting for his replies...

Every single day,whenever i open my email,i'm so looking forward for his replies,but,dissapoint me again.I do not know what happen to him but i'm very concern about him.What couldn't he accept me?Since both of us love each other?Why? =(

I'm searching for you every where but......

I know you know me and are looking at me,but how about me?I didn't even take a look at you,i didn't get the chance to take a good look at you,how can you be so cruel to me?Are you playing hide and seek with me?How am i going to forget you?You gave me a deep impression inside my heart.You have used a knife to curve your name inside my heart already.How am i going to forget you?

God!Why are you doing this to me?What are you trying to do?I misses him so much,waiting for his replies every single day.Even his computer crashed,i still hope for him to online one day.Am i wasting my effort?Am i wasting my time and effort?

Dear heavenly father,you are my Abba father.I thank you for letting me to know who is him and died on the cross for our sin.I love you truly.Let my wish come true,my dearest abba father.Let him online,let him reply my email,let him be my part of my life forever and ever.I believe you have seen my prayer.Everything i pray in your mighty jesus name,Amen! =)

Misses him
Love him...
Waiting for him...

2008-05-18T22:03:00.000+08:00

I'm so happy!!Finally he replied my email.I know why he didn't online.It's not because he's avoiding me,it's because his computer are crash.Phew..Well,in the end,he still said that he prefer to be friend.haiz...this really disappoint me.How can i persuade him or convince him to give this relationship a chance to work out?

I really love him.He give me a very deep impression,a kind of feeling that he is the one for me.I have been searching in school for guys to like me,finally,there's one,but....

Well,if i can really stead with him,with or without money,as long as i can see him,i am happy enough.Atleast i get to see him.God!How and what should i do again?

I love him.
Misses him...

2008-05-18T00:14:00.000+08:00

After a few days,i didn't get to see him online.i don't even know whether is he avoiding me purposely or he really didn't online at all..I miss chatting with him and am waiting for him to online 24/7.haiz...where's him?Who can tell me?I felt so helpless.I can't contact him through hp because his hp spoilt.Am i fated to be with him?God...Please tell me...What should i do?Please guide me.Am really helpless already... =(

Misses him...

Long time no see....!!!!

2008-05-13T22:46:00.000+08:00

I was away from home and school for almost one week because i was hospitalised again that is due to food poisoning.Now i am at home resting well.

Well.getting to know my new classmates,i don't think i can't mix up with them quite well because there are too many people's name that i have to remember.I am trying my best to be close with them but i only attentted school for only one week and i was gone missing.How and what should i do?To be close with them?I'm quite worry and scared that i am being alone/being leave out alone.

But thanks to my dear dear,he supported me alot.I love him...Though we are in different races,but we really in love with each other.We went through thick and thin,arugements and more,but we still able to encourage each other.Together with him going to one month soon.Times does counts how much we love each other.Right?haha...

Now i'm at home studying,playing and sleeping.Hope i can pass this semester.Pray hard that everything went smoothly for me.haiz...

2008-04-23T18:30:00.000+08:00

I'm not back to school yet as i was hospitalised during the past few weeks.I just got discharged today.Coming back home seems weird to me.I don't know what to do at home so i decided to blog online.

Staying at the ward,i get to know new friends.We will still keep in touch.Some of them have not discharge yet so i will be waitiing for them to discharge then unite together to go out together.I really miss them alot alot alot....Tomorrow i will have to go back to school.School life?suits me?or going to work suits me more?

*Thinking*.....

Happy Belated Birthday to me....My birthday have already past few weeks ago.Thanks for those friends who remembered my birthday,wishes me and even celebrated my birthday with me in the ward.I'm really very touched.Though there's no gift,but sincere is the most important thing.Thanks to my primary school mates...haha...Thanks Melissa and Judy.. =)

2008-03-27T20:56:00.000+08:00

Yo! School going to start soon...it's a stress to me.I do not know why,maybe because i am afraid i can't cope with the stress that the lecturer are giving us?Is poly life suits me?If it doesn't,why god in the first place place me in this course?

God!I believe that you place me in this course have your own reason behind it.I know there are many many obstacles in front of me that you have created for me.Somehow,i lost faith in you and have a lots of doubts in you.Slowly,my faith for god is extremely low until i went for the easter service that the drama really touches my heart and from there,my faith started to grow slowly,i try to keep the fire burning as strong as possible too.God,i believe in you and have faith in you.I willing to make a step out to go to school and start afresh from this year 14th of april 2008 on wards.I knew there's purpose in it...am i right?

My heart is bleeding like river are running fast.Hope everything will be peaceful for me once school start.I pray hard and i will definitely sacrifice my life for god.

As for today,there's nothing new thing happen.I went out in the early afternoon to jurong point to meet someone,but i only stay there less than 2 hours and i went back home because i was very tired.And i spend my whole day at home eating,watching DVD and sleep.i think one day i will become a pig already.haha...Well,just for information,i'm broke but i will still go out w/o any cas on me.Good right?Smart right?haha...So,if want to go far places,i'm not the best choice.haha...I said first before people said i ps them.haha...

Actually,stay at home is also a good thing.Can rest more.Once school start,you want to rest?I guess is hardly already.Have to rush project,wake up early and etc...Wah!!!I can't imagine my poly life...God!!!!!You must help me....In jesus name i pray,amen!

2008-03-26T21:26:00.000+08:00

在每一个人的世界里都有黑暗的一部分，都有不能说的秘密。在这个世界上，有随能数说他们的痛苦给别人听呢？随会愿意去听？？

自从我会到新加坡来，去了教会之后，我种觉得人一直在变。好或坏呢？由不得我来评论的。时间过得好快，三月份又要过了。我变得越有越多压力了，不知道为设么。。。。天啊！我该这么办？你能不能帮帮我呢？有好多决定等着我去做，但是。。。。。。。

在我生活里，我遇见了一位男生。遇到了他，好像遇到了我的白王子。虽让他皮肤是黑黑的，但是，跟他在一起，我一点压力都没有。我感觉到好开心哦。明天就是我跟他的第一个月周年在一起。我好希望所发生的事情都会把它给忘掉，从新开始。不管这么样，我都希望我们会一直在一起。我不相信" 永远" 这个字,我希望时间能证明.

HAPPY 1st Month Anniversary....!! =)

2008-03-09T20:14:00.000+08:00

Recently,i went out with my friends..Yesterday,i met some of my friends down to coffee shop to have two bottles of beer.I didn't drink much because it's so bitter.haha...I still prefer alcohol in my life.Alcohol is bitter but taste sweet also.hees...

Well,i didn't attend both CG and SVC for this week because of ...........I don't want to come out with any excuses to over my absent in chruch.I also don't wish to quarrel with my CGL over such a small matters.Both faults...ya?Right?But please don't ASSUME anything unless you know what's going on.

Somehow,i don't know whether is it i fall in love with a guy?He is always thought in my mind,my soul and my heart.I misses him alot but i don't think we are compatable...in some way...Is he the one for me?Compatability?70%?What should i do?I think i should focus more on my on coming medical appointment and school reopen things.Karling ah karling,don't think too much already..Just focus on what you shouild be focus on....bllluuuurrrr....don't make the same mistakes again....*!!Wake up!!!*

2008-03-02T11:36:00.000+08:00

我种觉得我好没用哦。。。没有一件是我是做得好的。天啊！随能帮我？我看只有我自己帮自己而已了。有句话话说：“人停但是时间一分一秒的再走”。我社么都不会做，不能读书，不能做工，就是应为我的了犹豫症，又弄上我的脚。只能在家里休息。好像猪哦。。哈！

我对我的教会的组员都好不好意思呢。我好挂念他们，好久没去教会了。希望我的组员能够明白为设么我不能去教会。 =）我想对他们说：“嗨！好久不见了！过的好吗？我好像你们哦。。你们有没有想我呢？？对不起哦。不能和你们一起聚一聚了。没关系。你们一定要等我回来教会哦。好不好？。”=）

2008-02-27T09:43:00.000+08:00

Well,i didn't post for a few days...i'm not busy but lazy to blog.haha...i'm busy preparing something for all my friends.

I injured my both legs and now i'm in wheel bound.No where i can go unless someone willing to push me around?I'm wondering,will my bestfriend push me around in JP,willing to bring me out or reject to bring me out because of inconvenience?Well,one of my true friend did that to me already.She told me that it is very inconvenience to push me around JP and who is going to push me?I'm so upset upon seeing such a sms sent by her.Am i her true friend?

If it's true friend,how can she look down on me?I really don't know what to say to her.I scolded her that is this what i want?Why can't she be mopre understanding?A persn grow spiritually but maturerirty?

Thanks God that one of my friend willing to push me around JP yesterday.I'm really touched by what he did.He don't mind whether i can walk or not.He just bring me around in wheel chair.I should thanks him. =)

Now is already end of Feb going to March.Schoool going to reopen for me but i'm not totally prepare by it.I'm scare of the crowd.God!help me to overcome my fear.i don't want to miss another one more year. =( This song that i put on my blog,i love this song very much.It's very meaningful.Actually is a drama called "Life Made Simple".This drama is a very nice and touch show.

This afternoon i will be going to see doctor in NUH again.Well,chaos...that's the only word that i can describe.Lots of problems..Who willing to accept me as his gf?Am i right to say so?Sad....Fate is fate...

2008-02-24T20:42:00.001+08:00

Hi everybody! I'm back to S'pore already. Well,the past few days i didn't online was because i was admitted to Alexandra Hospital. I just got discharged today morning. I'm really speechless because i injured both of my legs and have to be on wheel chair that no where i can go. I goin to school reopen soon,but every time,i kept hospitalising,i feel that i am a burden to my parents. Other than hospitalisation,i still have medical appointment to go for,one will be tomorrow morning. Well,one of my friend asked me to apply for MSW(Medical Social Worker). I have already applied but the conditions stated were not fit to apply.

Gosh..Abba Father,I always believe in you,i put my trust in you.Bless me,help me with my situation now.Help me to overcome all these obstacles.I will continue to have faith in you! =) Now, i'm not studying,thanks God!If not,somehow i will have to miss alot of lessons again. I'm now predicting my days when my school reopen,will there be any problems,miss lessons?But no matter what,i will study at home.I have already learned my lessons last year. =) Be persistent in your work!

"For i can do all things through christ who strengthens me!"

2008-01-11T13:35:00.000+08:00

Yo!! I will be going back to malaysia tonight. I will definitely miss my friends in singapore.Haix..I will be going back for a months plus...i don't even know whether can i online in m'sia. Hope i can.haha..Well,i have been staying in Singapore for 2Weeks and my 2 weeks aren't as free as you guys think.haha..I have been travelling here and there..extremely tired..Want to zzz till late afternoon also cannot...no choice..sacrifices..haha.. >.<

2008-01-03T22:20:00.000+08:00

Today i went for my medical appointment.Well,i have to go through another surgery which is done in day surgery.I really can't imagine how my future would be like.It look like a haze to me,so blurr...I'm wondering how many more times must i still have to go through all these tough times,poke my hands with needles and those painful period?

I just came back to Singapore this Week and was like the past few days was already fully booked.I'm really very tired.I thought that i come back,i can really give it a rest,but too bad.It is all my wishful thoughts.

Next Week,i'm even packed!Let me show you my next week schedule.

7/1/08(Mon)

Appointment with psychiatry doctor in the morning.
Then,appointment with my occupational therapist in the afternoon.

8/1/08(Tues)

Appointment with my dental doctor in the late morning.
Then, appointmnt with my gastro doctor in the late afternoon.

9/1/08(Weds)

Appointment with my O & G doctor in the afternoon.

10/1/08(Thurs)

Appointment with my pain clinic doctor in the early afternoon.

11/1/08(Fri)

Have to go to Hougang Day Care Centre to find my counsellor to settle some things.

16/2/08(Sat)

I will have my backbone injection to do in NUH Day Surgery OT in the morning.

Well,guys,you see?I only left with Saturday and Sunday to rest.I'm really have no more energy to complete all my undone things that i just left singapore suddenly last months.

So to all my dear friends:

I'm sorry that i couldn't take up some time to go shopping,sms,call to chit chat with you guys.As you can see my schedule for next week is really very tight for me to arrange time for you all.I hope that you all won't be angry for being not able to accompany you all to go shopping,watch movies or to have a meal together.If i really have extra time,i will really ask you all out.Don't ever have the thinking that "i forget you all already" or all sorts of unreasonable reasons.Please do understand my situation now as it's not as good as you all think.No matter what,i will think positively because i know that i have a group of friends who will help and support me forever! =)

朋友万岁！！！！ =）

希望你们能体谅我。。

有不明白的地方，我很欢迎你们打电话问我或可以发件讯。。

谢谢！=）

Now my priorities is on all things EXCEPT Relationship. =)

2008-01-02T22:31:00.000+08:00

我的人生都要从头开始。我的未来，没有人能预算得到的。天啊！为何每一件得不好的事情都发生在我生上？我那里做错了？我谁都不能怪。对不对?

最近,我好像喜欢上一个男人.他的人地却不错,我认识他已经有一年多了.我满了解他喜欢跟他的不喜欢的东西,还有所有的东西.但是,他好像对我没有好感似的.我只好等他.

Waiting for you,i will wait for you.

Sometimes,i am thinking that i have lots of wishful thoughts.Kind of like wanting to laugh at myself.Why am i so stupid?Will a guy would like to have a girlfriend who is full of illness additional with mental illness?Am i right?I don't even know i should laugh or cry.Am i thinking too much?Forget it bahx..haix...Someone told me, I MUST THINK POSITIVELY!! =)

2008-01-01T00:05:00.000+08:00

A Brand New Year!!!!

^^^2008^^^

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL OF YOU!!!

A brand new year,a brand new start.
Past is already Past.Welcome the future~~!!

warding

2007-10-16T11:41:00.000+08:00

I have already discharged!!Finally!!When i looked at my MC,i actually stayed in hospital for 101 days..Gosh!!I can't imagine..When i told my friends,they all were shocked!haha..101 is a good number,so coincidence..heess..

Well,dishcarged already and finally i can do the things that i need to do,settle things i need to settle.staying in the ward for too long,i'm kinda not use to outside world?The world seems to be so far away from me.I'm trying to find back my old life,the life that i used to have,but i realised that it's impossible for me to go back to the past life that i used to live for.Things are changing,people are changing too.What expected become unexpected for me.

I missed the ward(Joey,Xin Ru,Su Ren and other some nurses).I missed the day i used to be inside.But i realised that no matter how long i stay,i still have to come out.FACE THE REALITY!
I will never forget them especially Joey because she has already part of my life.In the ward,there are some politics going around regarding Joey,me and etc.But Joey still encourage me to stay strong when i am weak.One thing that we would do was,i will gave her a big hug after her work before she go home.I misses the hug,the warmness hug of all.I can feel that she care for me alot and trusted me 101%.Somehow,i broke her trust once,but thanks god!Su ren was the one who repair our friendship.From there,we treasure each other even more though i'm no longer a patient but a friend to her.

I grow up during my stay in the ward.I won't deny that because i know myself the best.Someone might comment that i become more quiet than before,maybe?I don't know why but just don't feel like talking.Like in the ward,i seldom communicate with my neighbours.I'm afraid that i might go back to the past,everything keep to myself instead of sharing that cause me to have stress and lead to depression.No matter what,i'm still me.Never change and God accepted who i am.I can see that everyone is changing,changing in what way?I'm confused and i don't know how to describe it.Thanks to Su ren,my occupational therapy,who is helping me in-patient and at the same time out-patient.She taught me how to conquer my previous nightmare,my stress and everything.I trust her too.First,i wrote letter to Joey and Su ren how i feel on that day.Slowly from there,i tried to speak up and talk to them instead of writting letters.Now,i guess i should try to use my mouth to express how i feel and what i'm thinking.I'm no longer using "i don't know" to cover my actions.

I want to start afresh!No matter is studies,friendship or relationships...I just want to start fresh.Now,i won't bother about the past.Whoever hurt me,whoever i hate them or quarrel before with my friends,i will let go and let god.I won't think of it because it will only cause me to have unneccassary stress...Now,i will be going to day care centre to occupy my time instead of staying at home doing nothing and start thinking of negative things.I guess Su ren really helps me alot..In the ward,they never use a mask to cover themself.They show themself as how they are.They are so true,unlike outside world,some people are covering their attitude,thoughts and character with a mask.Doesn't it seems to be scary?I dislikes this type of people.Why can't they be true enough to speak up the truth?Instead of running or hiding away?This time,i really learn alot of things about life as well as god more than i ever does.I will never hide my feeling and i will express out to the person i trusted most.Hope she willing to listen.

Last of all,i really have to thanks all my friends and my cell group members,especially Ken who always came and visited me the most of the time despite of his studies and work schedule.I really appreaciate the gifts and cards given by them.I love them lots and i will treasure them.

2007-08-17T21:50:00.000+08:00

"There are 'FRIENDS' who destroy each other,
but a REAL FRIEND sicks closer than a brother"
(Proverbs 18:24)

2007-08-17T12:50:00.000+08:00

Yo! I asked my mum to bring lappy for me to use in hospital.Finally!!!Yea!I got to use it.Think can pass my time fast?haha..Well,during today early morning around 4plus,i fell from my bed.*Paisei*Mayb i had a sweet dreams?Or bad dreams?I guessed i sprain my right neck and shoulder.It's painful.So now,the nurses ask me to have complete bed rest.Cannot go down by my own.Sob...BUT!There are happy things happenning in ward 12.I get to know alot of friends.Though is different age group,but we manage to get along well.This is communication skills!haha!I also build up my confident and self esteem.Thanks God!I received alot of cards from the patients here.So thoughtful! =)

Here are some updates of picture of my days in Ward 12.

Yesterday Nicholas,one of the patient,who was already discharged.This is the farewell party for him.Quite sad.I missed him lots because everytime,when i have problems,i will find him.DEFINITELY!haha!We had KFC,Cakes and our own dinner.Wah!!Actually,quite enjoy ourself here.Well,day past.All discharged except me still.Pray hard..haha..

!Ahmad and me!(He discharged alr) =(
MY good friend came and visit me =)
Lil girl,Xin ru and me.Cute right?Not me,i mean her?haha!
This is ytd the discharged man!Miss him.. =) Tall guy!!Ah yong!!V quiet guy.haha!

Me and Azlina!!KFC celebration for Nich!
Alice and me..~~Pretty right? >.< karen and me~~!!Once my room mate..haha!

This is the joker!Poh Yoke!Always make us laugh!haha!

This handsome guy is Mr Ho!Discharged alr lor!=)

Mummy & Me~~!

Took long jouney just to come here to take care of me!=)
Michelle & Me!Guess how old is she?haha..

We enjoyed sitting chatting with each other.We appreaciated the time we have together.I missed those days but!Let's meet outside but not in the ward.Yeah?GO OUT TOGETHER!!haha...Hoping for that day...I really appreaciate what they have advice me on and things that are happening inside and outside. =) Get well soon,everybody! =)

Actually i have more to update my days in ward 47 but now i lazy.Will update maybe tomorrow?More to go..haha.. =)

Now is my resting time already.Yea!Zzzz...

2007-08-13T14:07:00.000+08:00

I have been hospitalised for 2 weeks plus.Time flies...The days in hospital is rather bored?But luckily!I met a few patients who are very friendly and easy going person.We played Monopoly almost every single day,single hours?Can you imagine how bored it is our life in the ward?

Well,i can't discharged yet and my exams are coming.Counting down,it only left with 7 or 8 days?How fast it is?My mood is not very good due to the exams,really stressed me up.Others of my classmates will be sitting for the exams,how about me?*Depressed*

The doctor told me that my condition still not yet stable and have to seek treatment in the ward by eating the medicines regularly.How's life outside?I don't know.I miss my friends alot alot alot!Feelings that cannot be describe. =( All my patients(Friends) kept each other accompany. =) Thanks God!

I guess next timewhen i'm discharged,i shall write more about life in Ward 12 and what have i learnt in the ward. =)

2007-07-14T19:54:00.000+08:00

Long time never update..

I was admitted due to stomach discomfort for days.Today,i just discharged from NUH and have been staying there for 2 weeks 4 days.To you all,might seem to be a long day,but to me,it's rather short.I have fun getting to know many different people there,the patient,patient's parent,staff nurses,assitant nurses as well as student nurses.I realised that our life is very weak.Anytime,when we meet obstacles,we tends to bound back,running away or trying to avoid it.

Upon reaching home,my mind is very whirl.Things seems running fast in my mind,thoughts of negative as well as positive.A mixture of feeling - confusion,terrifying,unusual,lonliness and lots more.

I have missed school for exactly 2 weeks and also missed many important lessons in school.I'm worry about my studies and at the same time,i am afraid that i can't cope with it.I feel like running away.Monday,i will be going back to school to face it.It's a no choice things.Back to my old life style that i had.In fact,i'm not mentally prepared.

Long staying in hospital makes a person realised something more than others.A special feeling,a change of feeling,a change of mindset,a change of thinking.

!@# Exams Week !@#$

2007-06-26T01:12:00.000+08:00

Two weeks of holidays is over already.This week will be our Common Test week.

I'm not fully prepared for the exams,quite nervous..~~ I have been struggling with my Math,D.E and E.C.Gosh!This three important modules!!Yet i chose not to pay attention in class,chose not to do consistent work and etc.Well,it's true when we always said "reap what you sow".I have learned my lesson.First time in my life,i'm so nervous about the test.

Yesterday,which is Monday.I had my Math test.Well,what i can said is that, "reap what you sow".What did i sow? Is expected and i'm rather unhappy.I can blame no one but myself for not being paying attention and do consistent work. Poly life is so much different from Secondary school life.Poly is more on independent.School work,going to school and etc are really up to us to decide.No long secondary life where teacher will be chasing you for homework,screaming at you and more...*Miss those days*

After school,i went JP with Mei Xian.I went home after that to have my dinner first.Around 7plus,i went to JP McDonal with Yimin because we were meeting Ken.Both of us were studying there.Ken was teaching me D.E.Finally!!3 hours later,i understand 7 out of 10 of D.E.PTL!!In the end,Ken became speechless.haha...Because of my attitude towards studies.haha..!!

Tomorrow,i will be having my D.E test.I pray hard that all my Common Test will get atleast a pass.Pray hard hard!!I really learned my lessons.I have change my mindset.After Common Test week,i will start to re-plan.D.E!!!Argh!! *Confess the right thing*

2007-06-23T11:16:00.000+08:00

Impossible!

2007-06-19T17:32:00.000+08:00

Yo!Long time never update already.

Well,life's still the same.Now is the two weeks of school holiday.Going to end soon.Tests are coming soon.

For the moment,i'm not in Singapore.I'm now in M'sia,not for holiday but for something that is more important than holiday itself.Why i ended up in M'sia?Can't say it here.haha!I will be back to SG on Saturday morning.Then chiong for my Maths.Follow by going SVC.At night,will practice my Maths.On Sunday,depends,considering whether to go for Sun Svc or not.For the whole day long,will be studying for Maths and Electric Circuit.Haix..Stress!!!

So tired man!After the one whole week of common test,maybe have to go back M'sia again.Well,will be very busy this few weeks?Months?Have to re-arrange everything again.

For the moment,now in m'sia,my condition,i don't know what to say.I didn't get a good sleep when i reach m'sia.I don't know why and been studying,trying to stay focus on my studies instead of playing.

Time flies!I have cleared the mis-understanding with my friends.Sometimes,we have to go through tough time to get to know each other well.Thanks god!Everything went well.But one thing i have to said is that,i'm a person who does not know how to express my feeling or thoughts out.When i'm very depressed or extremely sad,i will just said that i'm sad or unhappy.I'm not good at words.Somehow,i know that i shouldn't make a wild guess.Well,past is past.Hope everything will back to the same,back to the past where we can be close and good friends again.

*Trust*

2007-06-10T21:30:00.000+08:00

Yesterday,I went svc again.Yeppi!!I'm quite happy. =) When i was on my way to expo,quite heavy hearted.Maybe due to the things happening in school.Somehow,it's friendship problems again.I realised one thing,whenever i have friendship problems,i won't get to know why and the reason behind it.Well,why must girls gossip?Is it girl's nature?

After attending svc and confide to my cell grop member,i'm no longer heavy hearted nor sad.They have enlightened me! =)Thanks guys who have cheer me up and encourage me. =) At first,i told my helper that my classmates are helpful,friendly and will never gossip nor backstab.My helper told me not to judge a person in such an early stage because i will never know what will happen when we continue to walk the path together.I don't believe a first,but now,i do believe.The fact is just right infront of me.My cell group member told me that,i should be happy that i know their true colors now than future when i share more secrets with them.I should count myself lucky instead of looking myself down so badly.

My friend gave me an example.

IF you are alone in class,some of your classmates will said you are a loner and weird.Some of your classmates will said you look cool,got character.

The point behind is how you present to others.

I must not look down on myself.God gave us confident but not fear.I shoud fear God but not man.From now onwards,i will look confident and show that i am confident.Eyes speaks everything!

After svc,we have dinner together.It's good to have a group of friends that are much more worthy to spent more time with.They are true friends,like sisters and brothers.Glad to have W317 to be with me,support and encourages me. =) Love them! =)

Today:

I plan to attend morning service but sleeping is more important than god,i didn't go.I end up sleeping until 11plus.I was so tired.I didn't sleep well yesterday night till morning because my left nose is blocked!SobSob...Then i plan to go prayer meeting.I met Yimin under her block and went together.Prayer meeting?I guessed i most afraid of because i don't know what and how to pray.haha..GOsh!!haha...SOmetimes,i feel like skipping prayer meeting but somehow is against the holy spirit.Well,today i went and really prayed hard.

After that,Yimin and i went out shopping.Won't give much info here.hees.. =) So this few days reached home quite late but with god,nothing is impossible and he will stengthen me! =)

There are upcoming events organised by a group of my friends. *Wonder how am i going to revise for my Common Test?* haha... I have my own priority. =) DOn't worry!! haha.. =)

*Yea,though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,I will fear no evil: for thou art with m; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me*(Psalms 23:4,NKJV)

2 weeks holiday start now!!

2007-06-09T01:25:00.002+08:00

Wooohooo~~~!! Two weeks of holiday start now!Well,this two weeks doesn't count as holiday because after holiday,we have common test!What kind of poly is these?Other poly have test before holiday,for us,is after holiday.I couldn't enjoy myself. =(

Well,recently,quite a bad thing happened.I mind in the first place,honestly,i do mind!I'm worry!Worry that no one willing to be my friends.I'm afraid to be alone.I do not know what's happening,but i realised that girls like to talk behind people's back.I'm changing now!I don't want to be a hypocrite.From now on,if i have mis-communication or problems,i will say straight infront of that person.I don't want to talk behind people's back.It's not the right way to do it.Moreover,is so disrespectful.I guessed what i hate most is that,i do not have privacy between a friend.When i am telling my friend a very serious thing in sms,my friend will save it and let other classmates to have a look at it.Where is my privacy?And is this the way you treat your friend?

If you want people to treat you good,treat them well too.It's common sense.From now onwards,i won't bother.It's just wasting my energy and time to bother about this.In this world,the only person who can judge me is only GOD!So,please don't judge me.You don't have the right to do so.Those friends that you spoke to,if they really believe in what you said,i'm speechless.Don't you remember that a sms msg can be edited? Don't be foolish. Do not believe in what you see or what other people said.Analyse!You won't know that he/she is telling you the truth or just a hoax.You'll never know.I'm in the light,but she is in the dark.

After all,this won't affect me much because I LIVE FOR GOD,BUT NOT FOR MAN!

This is what i want to tell you:

"I tell the truth in christ,I am not lying,my conscience also bearing the witness in the Holy Spirit that i have great sorrow and continual grief in my heart"(Romans 9:1)

Conscience is clear.I'm not afraid that you will get to see my post because i'm really stating the fact.From the way i see you,you always like to wispher to your friends.You won't straight away tell that person.Do you know that this kind of way will make me think that you are a backstabber?A hypocrites?

From what i'm suffering now: "For i consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us"(Romans 8:18)

Holy Spirit is my comforter,who comfort me lots! =)

2007-05-26T12:36:00.000+08:00

Week 6 is over soon.Fast!!Going to Week 7 already.Wow!!I can't believe it.

Well,my life is still the same.As usual!It's just that i'm abit more stressful than before because exams is coming.You don't think it's still far away!Actually is not.

I think i'm in love with someone again.This time,i'm really settle down myself.I will only like that person.Will never change unless he rejected me.IF not,i won't give up till the very last minutes.It's so painful to fall in love with someone.BGR seems to be complicated.Hurts a person most.

I will wait for his sms every single day.I will wait for his call every single day.haha...I won't tell him i like him unless i'm confirm.haha....But! This won't affect my studies.I know when to study,when to be sad and when to cry.haha...

Today Saturday again...Later on will be going SVC and after that,ken will be teaching me D.E.haha...My hope!My saviour!haha....Will be late home again.Weekends,i always have to sacrifice my sleep.Poor thing lehx...haha...I blieve it's fun that i can really settle down myself to worship and praise god!hees...He did me miracles. Praise the lord!

2007-05-21T21:21:00.001+08:00

Fast!It's already the 6th Weeks of school.Wow!!Well,i have been busying studying for my modules because i'm rather weak in certain modules.I doesn't want to repeat the module next semester.I have a high expectation for myself.

I'm rather a type of "kind be bother" girl nowadays.Why cause me to be in this state?Not enough sleep?Stress?

Haix,It will be good if i only have study stress.But why!God!HE has given me such a dfficult test that he is testing my faith in him.There is one problem that i can never solve it,which i relationship problem.No matter how mature i am,i doesn't know how to solve,doesn't know the solution and what's right and wrong.

On Saturday,something shocking happened.Well,i really do not know how should i explain myself.They did not get the right picture,i guess?They are just giving me false hope?I won't deny that i have feeling for him.I won't deny that i start to like him.So what if i like him?This time,i'm confirmed that i really like him.It's real,no more fake.Past is Past.Let's not bring up.Now,i want to start afresh.Advice given by my friends is that,"it's not the right time","he might not like me seriously" and Etc.So what should i do?

In the past,we sms-ed each other almost everyday an only get to see him on weEkends?or Weekdays too?I really miss him.I'm waiting for him to sms me no matter i'm in school,at home or at church.But,he has changed to another person.He start to avoid me,start not to sms me already.Why?

I really wanted to ask him is he afraid that his friends will get to know?Why must he hide?Is there something that you can't let them know?Can you give yourself more courage and tell me how you feel?I don't want to imagine or guess.There's possibility that i might guess wrongly for all.Maybe you just treat me as good friend,but i thought you like me.YOu know?I don't want such things to happen.

One of my friend told me not to sms-ed him,not to give him false hope and just be neutral.How my!Can i ?

I pray to God every single night.Hope good things will happen instead of bad things.I'm rather vex this few weeks.I'm tired.Really tired.Life is so meaningless for me now!School --> HOme --> School --->> Home..It's like a daily routine.

Haix!! I'll wait for you.

Hope everything will turn out to be fine. =)

是你在那个雨季闯进我生命,
带着一点任信和迷路表情,
是你在那个雨季赶走了孤寂.
温暖的笑容化我仅有的坚定.

天上亿万颗星星,
我却只看见你.
要说这是幸运,还是不可思议,
身边有太多风景,我却停在这里,
说我傻得可以,还不是因为你.

是你的声音,带给我勇气.
恋爱的频率,就在我心底.
如果你愿意,是的/我愿意.
来做我幸福的主旋律.

从前都是你,现在我相信,
天空会放晴,爱会更甜蜜,
如果你愿意,是的/我愿意.
爱的主旋律,永远唱下去.

2007-05-13T22:02:00.000+08:00

I haven been update for days.

I'm so busy in school.Everyday go out early come back late.That's how poly life is... =) I really must try to adapt poly life as soon as possible.If not,i guess i can't take it?Time flies..Now is already the 4th wEeks of school already.1month...I still can't get it what's the lecture are teaching.Well,i'm trying to pay attention,trying to understand,somehow my ears are shut.haax..

Not much i can said.I don't wish to mention.Quite personal.

I wanted to share my problems with my CGL,but whenever i wanted to approach her,i'll stop and think.Why?I don't know too. I shall handle it myself. I know it's not that she can't sense anything,i believe she sense something,but it's just that she didn't ask.I guess she want me to approach her?

Maybe i guess wrongly,maybe i think wrongly.I don't know.Anyway,doesn't matter.As long as i still can take it,i will continue to do.

=)

坚强。。。。

Btw,a few more hours to Gwen Birthday..~~Here wishing Gwen first..Adavanced by a 1hour plus plus... hees..

GWEN AH GWEN!!

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY!!!

2007-05-05T21:09:00.000+08:00

What's wrong with me?

First day of the week

2007-04-30T20:28:00.000+08:00

Today,i went to meet Mei Xian at Boon Lay Interchange at 7.40a.m but both of us were late.I was overslept and Mei Xian was having diahorrea since the yesterday?I reached BL interchange first and i saw many poly students waiting for their friends.Among the crowd,i saw someone from the same primary school with me,it's Mei Fong.I guessed she recognised me and i recognised her too.It's just that we didn't talk.A few minutes later,i saw Mei Xian.She have to go to toilet to do business.haha...I predicted that we will be late for our first lesson,which is YAPMC lessons.I am always late for his lessons.Do not know why,maybe no fate?haha...

By the time i reached YCK,it was already 8.55a.m.I went to cheers with Mei Xian to buy breakfast for Liling,Meryl and ourself too.When we reached the class,it was already 9.18a.m.haha..Guessed the lecturer will recognise our faces..haha...His lessons was so bored!I can't understand what he's teaching and was jumping the topics all over the places.Gosh!!I was trying my best to figure out man!!An hour passed and i told Meryl that i hope the lecturer will said break for 10mintues.After i told Meryl,he really gave us 10minutes break immediatly lehx..aha..Thanks god man!!haha...Meryl,Mei Xian and i decided to go out of the room to eat our breakfast.On the way out,i think i sprain my back?It hurts..If i'm not wrong,is the place where my doctor have injected for me on last saturday.

After awhile,i'm okay and continued the lesson.Just passed 5mintues,my back hurts again,this time round,not only 2 mintues or 3mintues.It's a type of pricking pain and i quickly told Liling and Meryl about it.Luckily,lesson ended at 10.45a.m plus.Liling,Meryl,Mei Xian and Chan accompany me to find Dr Wee.Her room is just nearby our lecture room.It's not far away.
We ended up in a small meeting room resting and wait for Dr Wee.She was having meeting.After that,she came and asked me whether i need to go home?I said it's okay because i don't like to go home during school hours which i have already attented half the lessons for today.

Then we went for our next lesson.K K Steven lesson.Gosh!!!He don't know how to teach.We were late for the lesson and was trying our best to focus..FOCUS...but we still missed it.So pity!!He asked us to do two excerises.One was done by chan and another one,i was totally lost.I don't even know how to do lorx..When he came and spot check us,he said we leave blank,so i told him that i do not know how to do.You know what he replied?"Of cuz la,you never practise".I was like,what?How to practice when i don't even have the template in my own laptop?He is a teacher who just go to school to get salary only.He even spot check our shoes!!Gosh!!Unbelievable.Buay Tahan him.

He released us early.I was still in great pain so i decided to get panadol from Dr Wee.Liling and Mei Xian helped me to take from Dr Wee.Followed by,we went to have our lunch.After lunch,after eating the panadol,omg!!My back pain got worst!it's even painful than before.This time,i decided to rest in Dr Wee's room.While walking to her room,Liling was holding on to me but i really can't walk and i just sat on the floor.They went to call Dr Wee.Somehow,i did cried because it's really unbearable.In the end,i went to her room and rest for about 30minutes?or less than that?I'm not sure.

I decided to go back to attend my last two lessons,programming.In the end,i learned nothing but at least i understand how should i do.Well,today wasn't my day.I went to school for nothing but to get sick only.Haix..

Thanks to all my friends who have helped me out today.Thanks lots.Appreciated ^^ Glad to have you guys as my friends.You guys rocks man!!haha.. =)

I reached home at about 7plus.I rest awhile and now,i'm doing my homework,revising and pile up all the notes for someone "special".haha..no la..Not special..is "weird"??haha...

I'm in a better mood today.Thanks to my friends for entertain me and thanks God for answering my prayer. =)

I'm really tired mentally,emotionally and physically.Projects,projects and projects.Poly life is like these.I can't change and to accept the fact.I get to know more friends,get to gain more knowledge.I'm going strive hard to get a good results.I have lost to all the students in my health only but not studies.My health...Hmm,i will never look back in the past but to look for the present and future.haha...I'm tired but i can't give up.Now,althought i have pain,i'll still tolerate and complete all the revision and homework that need to be completed as soon as possible.Jian ci xia qu!!

2007-04-29T18:29:00.000+08:00

Wow!!Didn't update for a few days.I was very busy with my projects and stuff.Poly life is so stressful.haha..I can said is quite interesting too...I get to learn new things.

It's so tiring nowadays.I lack of sleep.haha..I hope to have 24hours for me to sleep.ZzzZzzz...

Yesterday morning,i went to Mount Alvernia HOspital for my medical check up.My backbone is getting painful and worst too.So when i went there,the doctor told me that she will have to inject my bone to get rid of the pain.I was like.. "uh??!!"I'm scared of the sharp and shiny needle!!Gosh!!No choice,if i didn't inject,i will pain till i faint.haha...So the first time she injected into my bone,it was so painful.Painful!!!After that,she took out the needle and injected into another of my bone.I was like "argh!!!!".It's unbearable~~

After that,i went home and meet Yimin for lunch.Supposed to meet Meryl to do project together,but last mintues,she called and said that she have something to handle,so have to cancel the meeting.I suggested to go JP with Yimin to buy Gwen and Huiping's Birthday present.

In between,something happened but i don't wish to mention it here.Only Yimin know.I went for Svc yesterday.Met him at City Hall.A special speaker came and preached.The sermon is easy to understand.I like it.I think out of the eight points,one of the point attract me the most.It's about friendship.

After the svc,him and i went for bible study given by Mr ah Ken.The way he speak is full of actions and i kept laughing away lo...Then we went to eat.I didnt have eat cuz i have no appitite. =( I took ken's car home sweet home.

Nowadays,i'll get angry easily.I do not know why,maybe i'm too stress?too tired?

2007-04-25T21:50:00.000+08:00

Never update my blog since the second week of my school?Quite a long time..Well,many many interesting and upset matter that was happening the past few days.

I'm so glad that i have found two good friends in my class that really understand me and share ou problems together.I do not know whether this friendship will last or not,but what i know is that i MUST treasure the them before losing.

My life still goes on as per normal.I was quite busy past few days.NO project yet but due to the timing that we end our lessons was quite late.By the time i reached home was already evening or night.It was quite a tiring week as i have to wake up so early and go home late.

In school,didn't really paying attention in class.I was using my laptop all the way till the lesson ended.haha..Smart right? >.<>

Today,something happened to me.Was quite upset.I'm at faults but i have tried my best to make it up.I realised that we do not even have the trust or faith which is the most basic required for friendship.I was in Dr Wee's room that i was from a talkative person to a very quiet person.I was so upset that i wanted to cry.I thought awhile and i asked myself,why should i cry?It's not end of the world and it's just a minor case.I have god with me. =) Friends,i should treasure.If they don't treasure,why should i?

I'm not saying that i want to end this long friendship,i'm just wondering where is our forgivness?I thought this is the way to have a prolonged friendship?Isn't it?We are not perfect,neither are you.Haven you done any mistake that people have forgiven you?Luckily,i have a group of good friends in school that really encourage me,giving me advice.Thanks and glad to have you guys! =)

I'll be rather busy dealing with my work,up-coming projects and stuffs.I might not have the time to rest well...God bless me~~

Today i went NUH for my appointment,thanks god!!Everything was fine!The doctor told me that if the pain getting worse,tell my gastrology doctor and take blood test again.Hope not...If not,my hand will have to suffer again,poor hands and legs.haha... =P

I have to sleep early today as i have to wake up at 5.45a.m tomorrow.Lesson starts at 8a.m and ends at 6p.mWhat a looooonnnng day....

2nd day of sch

2007-04-17T20:30:00.000+08:00

Today i woke up at 6.45a.m.That's so early for me that school lesson start at 9a.m.When i woke up,my stomach started to pain and gastric pain too.It's so unbearable.I told my mum and she told me not to go to school.Get an MC but it will be so troublesome for me because i have to apply leave through internet,our school e-services.I told my mum i can take it but upon her insisting,well,i went with her to central.

When we reached there,there were already 6 people in front of me queueing up to see the doctor.I saw the clock was 8.15a.m but the doctor haven start seeing patient.If i continue to wait,i will be late for school so i decided not to see doctor and buy so medicine and eat.After that,i took cab to Yio Chu Kang Mrt to meet Meryl.I was late again because it's so far from Jurong.Haix...I'm always late.. =(

Meryl and i went to find the lecture room but somehow,we know the place but do not know which room to go.There were some students standing outside the lecture room and decided to ask for help than standing outside doing nothing.I asked a Year 3 student and told me is lecture room 7.Went in and was correct.haha..So complicated that until now,i still do not know how to walk.haha...First lesson was MAth.Gosh man!!I'm so blur that i do not know what's going on.I catch no balls.haha...I try my best to listen and thanks god!I managed to understand some of the parts.I can't slack.It's too dangerous if i failed one of my module.God blessed me!! =)

After that was our lunch.I have lunch with Meryl and Liling(came back from somewhere..haha) at Mcdonal's.haha...I don't have appitite because of my diaahorea.haix...Then i didn't managed to finish all my food.Wasted!Haix...Then i called Dr Wee and told her i got something to tell her.So Dan,Meryl and Liling followed me to Food Junction to meet Dr Wee.We chat and stuffs,then Liling suggested that they should leave the place because i have something confidential to tell Dr Wee.Regarding the assitant class rep,i told Dr Wee that i am more than willing to help liling and stuffs,but she don't allowed due to my health. =( I was so sad and felt so discouraging.

I really wanted to be because that was my wish long long long ago till now.It's just that i was not given any chance to be.What Dr Wee told me was that she wanted to choose a guy that can carry heavy things.I can't fit to do that job.Haix...Sad!! =( Why must be my health that stop me from being a assitant class rep?Why?Why is that so?My dream to be a assitant class rep is vanished. =( I chat with Dr Wee for quite a long time and was late for my next lesson.Luckily it's not that late,just 5mins.haha...

Then our lessons end at 6p.m today.I didn't pay much attention because i do not know what the lecturer was talking about.haha...So i was chatting with Meryl and Liling..haha..GOsh!!Must buck up!!Cannot like that....haha...

After that we headed home.I do not know whether issit i was so tired that i took the train which terminate at Yishun!!!hhaha...Then i have to alight and wait for the next train going towards Jurong East.haha..Next time must look carefully before boarding the train.haha...I reached home about 7plus going 8p.m.

Now,i am so tired!I want to sleep without batheing too..I have to wake up soooo early.Gosh!

Gtg!I have to do something that needed to hand in to Dr Wee tomorrow.haha.... =)

first day of school

2007-04-16T20:54:00.000+08:00

Yo!Today is the first day of school.Poly life starts now!WOooohoooo~~Today i couldn't wake up and wanted to skip lessons today.haha..Too tired le.Yesterday i slept at 12plus.So late...

Today,when i reached my house bus stop,waiting for bus,suddenly,i stomachache.I do not know why and wanted to go toilet but if i go home,i will surely late for lessons.Gosh!Then i control and control.All the way was okay for me until i reached Boon Lay Interchange.My stomach started to pain but it's time consuming.haix...So i control and control my bladder.It's tough for me!!It's sooooo pain till i really sweat and my face turned pale.When i reached Jurong East Interchange,i transfer to the red line.When i got into the train and starts moving towards Bukit Batok,my stomach was extremely painful that i really want toilet and can't control le.I do not know what to do but to control my bladder again.

I kept praying to God and i tried to sleep in train to divert my attention on the pain.I pray that the train can reached Yio Chu Kang as soon as possible so that i can go toilet.I sleep sleep sleep and finally!!I reached YCK le!!Thanks God!I was already late meeting up with Meryl.I meet her 8.40a.m but i reached there at 8.50a.m.I meet Liling at auditorium and was late too.Sorry guys!Then i quickly went to toilet,but nothing come out.I do not know why!!!!

After that,we walked quickly to the Lab room because the lesson starts at 9a.m.When we reached the room,opps,it's already 9.15a.m.haha..Luckily the teacher didn't scold.haha...Then talk talk talk about the module and stuffs and introduce what's the module about.2hours inside...After that we break.Liling,Meryl,Chan and me went to Food Junction to eat our lunch,but i don't have appitite.Thanks to my stomach pain. >.<>

After using the toilet,we went to find Dr Wee,but we do not know where is her room.We were like walking round the school and asked people where is the hall of innovation.haha..No one knows.Patheic.Then finally,we saw our saviour,Wei da!!haha..Then we asked him and he told us how to walk.Wah,i think we took 20min plus just to find the room.haha..Finally,we found it!Liling told me is Room 475,but actually is Room 455.haha..See the different?haha...Then talk about stuffs and the class.Then we rushed to have another lessons.

We were late again.haha..This time,the teacher was fierce lo!!!I don't like him but i like the module.hehex... =) He gave us the angry look lo...Then we used the program to adapt the environment first.Then suddenly,i stomachache again.I asked Liling to accompany me to toilet again.haix..I think i have to stick to the toilet for the whole day.The teacher released us early and went back to find Dr Wee.I told her personally about my personal stuffs and talked quite alot.Actually,she wanted me to be the assistant class rep but after telling her,she told me to rest.haix..Honestly,i really wanted to give it a try to be an assistant class rep and help liling,but i do not know whether am i up to standard?Should i give it a try?Dr Wee gave me a task.She asked me to write a compo and passed it up to her on Wednesday when we meet her for lunch.

Don't misunderstood.It's not those english compo.It's my own personal compo.haha... :P Actually our mentor is a nice person.I really admire her lots. =) I seldom praise people,but she is really worthy to praise her.She's good.She is not only Liling's idol,but mine too.haha... =)After that we went to attend programming lessons.Opps,we were late again because of me.I talked too long with Dr Wee le..haha..Sorry guys. =) So today,we were late for the whole 6 lessons and we will said "sorry teacher,we are late".haha...Luckily this teacher is not very fierce.He is much more better,kind and friendly then the other two teachers lehx.haha..The programming was quite fun too...haha..I love it~~~

This teacher released us early again and some of us went to photcopy shop to buy the drawing books and wait for Wei da.Meryl,Liling,Wei da and me went to Cineleisure to have our dinner.We went to eat pastamania.Was quite nice la..Once awhile,should treat ourself better.haha...Nvm..haha.Exception for today.haha...After that,we went shop here and there.I went toilet again,of cuz.haha..Then Liling and i went home first because she got curfew and for me,i'm too tired and late when i reached home.So left Meryl and Wei da.So four of us went different way after that.

I reached home about 8plus.So tired.Haix..tonight must sleep even earlier and wake up tomorrow even earlier.Tomorrow my lesson will end at 6p.m.1 break only...Sianx...Now,i am thinking should i volunteer myself to be liling's assistant class rep?Can i do it?Should i?I really want to give it a try,but if i volunteer myself,what will people think about me?Haix...Who can advice me?

cele brating my belated birthday!!

2007-04-15T22:07:00.000+08:00

taYo!Today i didn't go service because i was going out with Lee Wee,Yishan and Edwin.haha..

I met Lee Wee under my block earlier,around 2.30p.m and went to Jurong Point to shop for her shorts and my stationary stuffs.In the end,she didn't saw the shorts she liked and we went window shopping.Shop until we both were hungry.haha..We will be meeting Edwin and Yishan at Sakae Sushi at 5p.m,but after our shopping,is only 4plus.I was so hungry and worst that it's going to rain soon.So we decided to call Yishan to fetch us at Jurong Point.Lee wee and i were waiting for him at Mos Burger.Around 4plus 5,he reached and we headed to Sakae Sushi.

We settled down and eat while waiting for Edwin because he will be late.I was so hungry that i ate alot of Sushi.haha...Around 5.30p.m,Edwin reached and i saw his face was so pale lo,especially his lips,which is in black.I can see he is really not feeling well.We ate,chat and talk alot of stuffs that we stayed there for 2hours plus.

Next,Yishan bought a cake for me and was served it as the last dish.I was so touched lo!haha...They sang the "happy birthday" song so loudly that i was so embarassed.haha... :P Then Edwin was making fun of me lo.He wants me to use my mouth to take out the candles.I was like,uh?Really arhx?Don't want la...haha...We were playing around lo...Then three of them wanted to make fun of me,used the cream to put on my face.But Lee Wee didn't.haha..Yishan make until my hand got cream.I think worst is Edwin!He hor!!Really forced me until he put the cream on my face lor!!!haha..I was like hide here and there..but in the end,still put cream on my face.haha...I think at Sakae,our group was the most noisy group.haha..Then i quickly wipe away the cream on my face.hahaLooked ugly and funny..haha..Too bad,didn't take photo of it.haha..

We stayed there until 7plus then decided to pay the bill.Total was $68plus.haha..Edwin went home first because he is not feeling well.Left with Lee Wee,Yishan and me.We decided to drink alcohol.We went 7 Eleven,Liberty and NTUC to find our favourite Vokda.But these 3 places didn't sell Vokda.Was like,What the?So,in the end,bought two bottles of alcohol and shared among 3 of us.We went to the nearby BBQ pit to drink.One of the bottle of acohol was so diffcult to open because we don't have the opener.Luckily,Yishan managed to open it up and starts to take photos of it.haha...We mixed the two bottles of alcohol together and drank it.When we finished it,Lee Wee and i were like,so bluurr..But not drunk yet.haha..We were chatting away.When Lee Wee and i going seperate ways,we were under a block.She said that my face is so red.When i reached home and looked at the mirror,gosh!It's really red.haha..I'm drunk!haha.No la... :P:P

After all,i enjoyed going out with them and thanks them for celebrating my belated birthday.Thanks guys!It's memorable.haha...Go K-box next time.Yea! =)

Those photo we taken is with Edwin and will update it when i received it.Now,i update the photo which three of us were drinking. =) 18yrs old!!Yea!!I can buy anything i want..haha...Cig?Alcohol?Wahahaha... :P

These was the alcohol that we drank. =)

Yaaammmm Seng!!haha...

We finished the both bottles in 5-10min time.haha...(No wonder I am drunk!haha)

We have finished it!!So fast... =(

Thanks guys for celebrating my belated 18th birthday!! =) You guys rocks man!

Go to sleep le.Tomorrow start school already.A brand new life!!Yea man! =)

Benny Hinn Service

2007-04-15T13:24:00.000+08:00

This week is Benny Hinn's Healing Service at Indoor Stadium.Three days,Friday,Saturday and Sunday.

Well,yesterday i woke up at 11plus due to someone sms-ed me.It's him.I called him because i lazy to type.haha...We chat for like an hour?haha...Then suddenly someone sms-ed me again,it's Karen.She asked me to tell him and his friend where to meet.I was chatting with him whether are we going for the service or not.At first,it's him who want to convince me to go,but in the end,it's me who convince him not to go.haha..I was just testing him how firm with his answer.haha...But it's not firm at all.haha..I do not know whether i want to go or not because the service will end late and i have to take cab home.It's expensive including midnight charge.So,i told Karen that three of us,him,his friend and me will not be going for this week service.Suddenly,she called me.She asked me to go Sunday if that's the case,but my friends have already booked me on Sunday to go Sakae.I can't cancel it off.Then she told me many things and i was like,"ok lo,go lo".I wasn't in a good mood anymore at that point of time.Cab home?It's so expensive and my situation now?Can i afford?She suggested that i can leave the service at around 10.45p.m.Atleast i was there for service,but the most interesting part was the last part,how can i go off early?Well,i do not know the service end what time.

In the end,i promised Karen that i will be going service.I called Ken and asked him whether is he driving?He said Ya but can't fetch me from Jurong.If i want,go to CCK and meet him.Then i was like,Ok lo.Can.When i put down the phone,i was thinking away,should i or should i not go by Ken's car?In the end,i choose not to take.I rather i take MRT.I called Ben and meet him at Boon Lay Control Mrt at 2.30p.m.I was late then.Met Ben and waited for Andy.Just awhile only and board the train.Meet Aziel and him at Jurong East.Guessed they have waited for us quite a long time.haha...I was all alone in the train listening to my MP3.The four guys were chatting away.We reached Kallang Mrt at about 4p.m.Meet up with another cell member.We walked to the Indoor Stadium.Quite far and under the hot sun,all of us were sweating.Gosh!!

When we reached Indoor Stadium,wow!!There were alot of people queueing up already.I was wondering how long have they wait?haha...We reached there around 4.30p.m and the gate will be open at 5.30p.m.1hour waiting hour? *Faint* We were chatting away and Ben kept bully me lo..Argh!! At around 5p.m,i looked back at the queue,and i saw the queue was so long that i can't see where is it.I have never see such a long queue before.Wow!!Luckily we reached there early.Phew! =) 5.30p.m,the gate was opened and slowly,we managed and finally that we were inside the hall already.So cool!!Thanks God that we managed to find the seats as soon as possible.When we have already settled ourself down,I saw Yingyi coming up and seat with us because she went by Ken's car.Not long after,i saw Karen was standing on my left side talking to our members.Yingyi was hungry and i accompany her to buy food.Well,i didn't talk to Karen.I don't wish to say a word or what and i just walked passed her.

By the time we have finished eating,we went back to find our seats.At the time,Karen was not there already.He passed me something that he told me that it's Karen wanted to pass it to me.It was a sling bag from W317 Cell Group and her own present for my birthday.Well,Thanks! =) Appreciated.Then Karen called me and asked me whether i like the present or not,but the hall was too noisy that it's tough for me to talk,so i sms-ed her and etc.Well,honestly,i'm quite angry with her but i'm not so unreasonable.I still appreciated the gift that she has given to me.It's just that i don't feel like talking.That's all.Soon,the service starts.Wow!1It's great,the choir team.haha...I'm so unfarmiliar with the songs that they sang,but i managed to catch the ball and sang it with them.After preaching and etc.I think the awesome part was the healing part.The presence of God was so strong that i really can feel it.Thanks god! =) The most shocking part was that,i saw a man sitting on a wheel chair can actually stand up and walk.It's so amazing!That's the miracles.Wow!!I have really experience and see it with my own eyes,the miracles~~
Another part was,when Benny Hinn said "Be touched" and the section where he pointed to actually fell.I was shocked at first.I do not know what to do because yesterday was my first time for Benny Hinn Service.We kept praying strong in spirit and the second time,Benny Hinn actually pointed at our section and i wanted to fall but i didn't.haha..The power of god is great!

Well,service ended at around 10.40p.m and went for a small breifing.When we went out of the hall,many people hired Cab.We wanted to take train but we did not not can we catch the last train.On our way,no cab!We decided to walk to Kallang Mrt Station.Michelle told us to walk after as we can catch the last train.When we reached the Kallang Mrt Station,the Boon Lay train will arrived at 2mins time.Gosh!Dannel and michelle managed to board the train,but Andy,Ben,Aziel,him and me can't.He went to top up his e-zlink card and the two person infront of him took so slow to top-up.Guessed it was their first time using the machine?By the time he finished topping up his card,the train has already gone!!!No choice,we have to take cab.Around 12p.m,we still can't hired cab.All on call!!!I was so tired,restless and so frsutrating.Waited for so long and no cab!We went to the other road side.Well,everyone was infront of us and got the cab.We have to wait and wait.Around 12plus,finally!We managed to hire a cab.The cab uncle said cannot sit 5 person,so no choice,Ben and Andy went off first.Followed by Aziel,him and me.When we got into the cab,do you know what the uncle said?He said that it will be better if we hired two cab because Sebawang and Jurong is two different ways.It will be very expenisive.Well,so decided to let him took the cab and left Aziel and me.We hired another cab and went off.I was so angry lo!Wanted to scold F*** but i didn't.I'm the only girl with the guys.Luckily Aziel and him were talking to me,if not,i will be left out alone!I won't go anymore,even cell group members called me.I won't be so soft hearted.

I reached my house downstair around 12plus and Yimin was waiting for me.Both of us went to Huiping's house just to collect my birthday present from them?haha..Thanks girls!! =) You're always there for me... Love ya!haha... We chatted awhile and i went off with Yimin.Both of us chat under my block until 2plus midnight.haha..Chat alot alot of things.So,went home at about 2.30a.m.haha...Well,what i told Yimin that i can't be like Gwen or Ken so hyper when coming to praise the lord.I'm the quiet type of person.I like to be alone and do things quietly.They shine for the lord in the way that we can see it from our eyes.But i'm not that kind.I shine for the lord,but is shine i secretly.If i like them,shine for the lord that is obvious,that's not me!Sometimes,i speak word louder than actions.But does that mean that i don't have actions?I have!Just that you all don't get to see it!That's me!That's my personality!I'm ok to have bible study,i'm ok going service and CG.But didn't i put in my effort to go SVC and CG?The most basic thing i should do?Whenever you all said bible study,i did say i don't want to go.But didn't i still attend in the end?Some people asked me to go for Mass bible study,but like i said.I prefer to be alone and not a big group or crowd.That's me!I have do what you all asked me to do.No matter how tired i am,i still have my quiet time every day now.I no need to explain so much as i think God sees every little effort i put in.You all don't see,God sees.I'm ok with it.

Once again,thanks friends for the present for my birthday!I like it! =) Thanks! =)

Outing with Friends...

2007-04-12T23:45:00.000+08:00

Today wasn't feeling well today and kena sun burn cuz of yesterday orientation.We played games under the hot sun,what do u expect?Sun burn lo...Kena Face lo...Sianx..Today i do not know why i so suay lo!Today is my birthday,and yet i sick and stuffs.

What i can do is just to stay at home?and Rest?Today i woke up rather early,at 9a.m?When i saw my hp,i was shocked!I received 6 smses from my friends.They wishing me happy birthday.haha.. =) Thanks to all my friends who have wished me happy birthday!Thanks for remembering my birthday. =) Thanks! Appreciated! =)

I went out with Melissa and meet her at BL control station,6p.m.I was late..haha..We went to ate KFC and decided to call Judy to tag along,more people more fun mah..haha..We waiting for Judy while eating our dinner...haha...

Then when Judy reached,i was so happy because long time never get to see her le....haha..Finally...today!! =) Suddenly,Judy told me that Sarimah and Huici was outside the KFC because band was just over.So i turned back and looked.When i turned back to the front,there was a piece of cake in front of me.Wow!!It's Judy and Melissa wanted to give me a surprise.Eventhough it's not a big cake,i still appreciated of what they did. =) Thanks friends! =) U're always there for me... =) We shared the cake.Not bad..I like it... =)

Next,Judy and Melissa accompany me to the Transitlink Office to apply for the Poly E-Zlink card before we went to IMM.When we walked to the bus stop,the shuttle bus have already arrived.We ran as fast as we could to board the bus.Wow!!So long never run already...haha... Then we went to IMM to shop for clothes,stationary and stuffs to prepare for the starting of the school.

I went in to the Giordano shop and went to try on a pair of Jeans which looks nice.I went to try and it's really fitted me well.The Jeans was so comfortable and nice that i decided to buy.When i saw the price,i was like, "opps".It cost $69!!So expensive that i couldn't afford it.Haix..How i wish i got that jeans... =( So i left with no choice but to search for better jeans and cheap too. =) Sad...

By the time we finished our shopping,we went back home sweet home.I reached home at about 11plus already.So tired..Gonna sleep early today...haha... =) More to come for tomorrow,the day after tomorrow and even more.haha... =) Enjoyed the day with Melissa and Judy.We have fun outside!

Sleep now...!! =)

orientation

2007-04-11T20:16:00.000+08:00

Today was the last day of the Orientation.Abit sad...Cannot see Wei Dadadada already....haha...Will miss him de.

Today i woke up late,overslept.haha..I have to reach school by 9.15a.m but i'm late!haha...I reached school by 9.25a.m.So late.My class was waiting for Liling and me.haha..Both of us late.Liling late because she was waiting for me.Sorry.haha...

The first thing that we did was to go to Lecture Room for the Preparatory Math.I thought it would be interesting because i will be learning something like A math.How would i know!The lecturer was a woman and the way she talk was like talking to herself?And even in mono tone.Wah...Sure sleep de lo....Then i was chit chatting happily with Liling,Zou Xing and some of the classmates.haha...After all,i managed to understand the part where is a math solving problem.Like solve the equation and sub the number,i know how to do.But the starting part,how to get the equation,i still don't understand.Wah...difficult lo...I was scratching my head away lo...Then i was bored until i went to sms Wei Da and complaint to him.Wahahaha....He took so long to reply me lo..wah...haha..

Then the next destination we went was to have our lunch at Canteen.This time round,no more free lunch.We have to buy it from the school canteen.The price is reasonable and the food is quite nice for some of the store.haha..Not all..haha..But still ok la... =) I ate the store selling mix vegetables de.haha...

After that,we went E-Plaza to sit for survey.The survey was so simple.It took me a few mintues to complete it.Yea! =) Then Wei Da brought us to Shopping Arcade to buy our math book,Mathematics with Calculus.haha..So thick and i guessed it would be tough!haha...I believed in god that i will proclaim the positive side instead of negative side.The Liling hor!Is like she helped 5 of the classmates to buy the book and after that,she found out that there's short of money.I kept calculate for her and stuffs,actually!She didn't pay for the book herself.haha..Funny lo..haha...

Then Liling,a few guys went off and left 8 of us.We went to the Sports Hall to play games.Well,8 of us were not so enthu for the games lo,unlike other classes,so enthu for it lo.haha..We combined with EC0710 and ours class is EC 0720.The game for us was quite successfully done and when we wanted to go to the next destination,i realised that how come only left 6 people.haha...I was wondering where the other two guy went?I asked Wei Da and i knew that they ran off.Haix...So not united de...Quite sad..

Next,we went to the outdoor staduim.By the time we reached there,our class only left with 4 people.Patheic right?haha..Play games and etc under the sun?Hot lo!!All sweating like hell and thirsty too.Wah!!But the game was quite fun lo,testing my memory.At first,the OGL asked who wants to volunteer to be the first person?Then no one willing lo and i got it lo!I was the first person in the line.Actually i wanted to volunteer,but i was quite worry that my brain can't work because i didn't study for 4-5months already lo.Turn rusty le..Then in the end,i still got it.The game was to memorise thousand words and passed it down to my members.Luckily,thanks god!I managed to remember all!Great man!It means that my brain still working..Not bad,eh?haha....Thanks OGLs for giving me the chance too..haha... =p

After that went back to sit and wait for further instructions.Wah,was damn tired lo!Even more tired than yesterday lehx.I really must thanks god that he have given me the strength to really pull through for the whole orientation,especially the games part.If not,i would have given up and went home early,but i did attend the orientation till the last. =) Happy for myself and our OGL was quite happy too.haha...He really told us not to go home first and etc,haha..Today is his birthday,so i give him 100% moral support and attention and really participate in the games. =)

Before we went home,we received an orientation package,free ice cream and the preparatory book and CD.haha..Quite ok la..And around 4plus,ended everything.Wah!!Quite sad..haha...That no one lead us to our perspective tutorial rooms and lecture hall le.haha..Have to count on my friends le..haha...If Monday,i don't know how to go to my class,i should call my OGL!!haha..Asked him to lead me the way.. :p :p ...Bully him.... =)

Everything ends well soomthly for me.Thanks god!Praise the lord!Thanks him for not letting me late for the orientation.haha... =) Hmm,starts to get to know each other better and better.haha..
Today quite tired le..So going to sleep early tonight.

Tomorrow is my 18th birthday!But i'm so lazy to go out to celebrate because i want to sleeepppp...haha...Then without Wei Da,not fun de..haha..No la..Joking Joking..Later he kill me arhx..haha...No matter what,i will still celebrate it. =)

Nitex!

orientation at NYP.

2007-04-10T20:30:00.000+08:00

Today went to NYP for Orientation.Today damn tired.I woke up at 6a.m in the morning and by the time i reached NYP,it's already 8a.m.Can you imagine?How far do i have to travel?haha..I fall alsleep inside the train lo...

Then i meet Edwin and his friend,Wei Jian at Sebawang Mrt Station.Suppose to meet Marilyn at Yio Chu Kang Mrt but she suggested to meet at auditorium.So fine with me.I walk with Edwin and his friend to the school and saw alot of people queueing up.We were so blur because we do not know what's happening.haha..Our course queue was the longest...Registered our name and got our respective classes.Weijian same class as Marilyn,Edwin and i is from different class.So was like,all not the same class..Sianx lo...I sat alone with those stranger but also hope to be friends with them one day.

I went in to the auditorium and sit together with the class respectively.First was a quiz.Is like,so boring lo..Everyone was so down,so sleepy..haha..Followed by welcoming the directors,speech by different respective department.I was falling alsleep away as well as the person beside me on the left and right and even sitting infront of me...haha..So i think you can imagined how boring it was.haha..

Finally,we were leaving the auditorium and tour around the school.Wei Da will be our OGL for today and tomorrow.At first,i thought he is a fierce person lehx,never smile or what.haha..But after since he tour us around the campus and talk to him.actually he quite nice la.Just that he is shy.haha...

After tour,we had our lunch at Canteen.I was wondering like,every where is air-conditioned except the Canteens.So funny lo...Like so unbalanced like that..I didn't finished up my food because i'm quite full.

Next destination was tour and another briefing again.Gosh man!Whole day briefing,i want to die liao...haha..Then i we went to the tutorial room to meet our PEMs,(personal mentor),like our form teacher.I thought she will be fierce because she look fierce.haha..When she start talking,chey!I scared myself off only...She's a nice teacher too.What she told us today really inspired me alot,especially when she wrote one sentence on the board,but i couldn't remember nor take down.Haix..too bad..

After that,meet Edwin at the main auditorium and HOME SWEET HOME!!~~~ haha... =)

It's quite tired today,but it's fun overall. =)

Tomorrow the last day of orientation le.Quite pity,so fast end le...haix..Sad.. =( School starts soon.I don't know what to wear.Haix..Think Think Think...

Have an early best wished to my OGL, Karl Tan Wei Da!(still got 2 hours and 48minutes to his birthday)

~~HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY~~!!!

Yea.A fresh start.

2007-04-09T14:35:00.000+08:00

Everything ends at a point.I got an answer from him.Althought it's quite upset,but he has his point and get an answer from him.Thansk God for everything he has done in me.I still have to carry on with my life.Nevermind,isn't end of the world.There are better guy in the world.This is just to console myself. =(

Well,when school re-open,it's a new start,a new life.I will get to know many people,will get to know more friends.I will focus totally on my studies,spent time with God and friends.I will not get into any relationship until i am confirmed and well-prepared for it.I have learned my lesson.I will get over as soon as possible.I will get over after tomorrow orientation.Yea! =)

Tomorrow is my orientation.Quite nervous and excited.haha...Thinking of what to wear.haha...Guess i have to buy alot of stuffs.Woohoo...Can't wait for school reopen.haha...

Actually i plan to buy Jeans today but i found a pair of new Jeans at home.Wah..Actually the new pair of Jeans,my mum bought it for me and i couldn' wear it at that point of time because i can't wear.haha...Today,i try my luck,i put it on and yet really fit it well.Wow...Thanks God that i can save the money.haha...

So,i will be staying at home today resting and prepare for tomorrow. =) Will be meeting Marilyn tomorrow and go school tomorrow.

outing wif gwen and huping

2007-04-08T23:46:00.000+08:00

Yo!

Today,i don't plan to go out until Huiping sms-ed me,asked me to go out to have dinner with Gwen and her.I was like "uh?Now?",when it was 5p.m.So late le still go out?I never go out so late before lo.haha..In the end,i met Huiping 6p.m under her block.haha...Her dad drove us to City Hall to meet Gwen.So blessed!haha... =) On the way,Gwen told Huiping that she has lost her Ezlink card that she have to go back to find.I was like,"how come?".haha...

Huiping and I reached City Hall Mrt Control Station and waited for Gwen.Hmm,guessed we waited for her only a few mintues.Then we headed to eat Sakae Sushi.We didn't eat alot because the handroll that we first ate made us half full.haha...We also spend time there talking,chit-chatting and stuffs.Quite fun la...haha..Happy too.. =) Think we spent atleast an hour or more inside.haha...Overall,we have to pay the total of $29plus after 10% discount.

After that,we went to shop for my jeans,but didn't saw jeans that i like.haha..abit saad..Then we went to Life Bookshop and i saw a book i'm quite interested in.hmm,but i cannot said the title out.haha..People will get suspicious.haha..Next,we went to Carrefour.We went to Women's department.haha...Then Huiping and I quite shy about it lo and Gwen was searching for her things.We chat about many funny things lo..haha..

Then we went to see and try out the foundation.Now then i know,Huiping de hand colour is different from her face colour.haha..So when Gwen put the foundation on her hand,haha..like don't suit lehx.haha...After that,we walk to food department!We went to find our chocolates....BUT!So upset,Carrefour didn't sell Dove chocolate.If not,i surely buy.Haix...And is like,some of the chocolate is going to melt like that lo or out of stock.Haix..Poor Service lehx..haha..In the end,Huiping and I buy nothing but Gwen,she bought 3 bar of Crunchy,1 box of Dar chocolate,tibits and more.haha..She not buying for herself only but her family too.So nice of her. =)

By the time we end our shopping,it's already 10plus le.So fast ya?haix..When we walking to the Mrt Station,i saw a couple wearing couple shirt and same colour too.They were just standing infront of us on the escalator.I told Gwen and Huiping and suddenly,both of them bully me lo.Both of them wear black shirt except me.So is like,odd one out.Haix..Sad..Then i told Gwen and Huiping that too bad i didn't wear purple shirt,if not,i can be their light bulb or one gang le.haha..Then Gwen said,one day,when I wear the same colour shirt as the couple and go out with that couple,then call her.haha..lols lo...haha...

We headed home,in different direction.So,reached home around 11plus.haha.. =) I had a fun day going out with Gwen and Huiping.Guessed the few hours,i laugh until my mouth can't even have the chance to close.haha..

Well,think it's late.Going to sleep le.Quite tired le.haha..Energy used up. =) Gd nitex!

I am wondering,have you really go and think about it?or you just hack care?I am really wondering,y the answer you gave it to me was always i dono?Does this shows that u care?or are you telling me you don't want to think and care anymore?If this is so,can u please tell me?I will hack care too.I know it's my fault that i hurt you first,but must u treat me like this?I just can't stand the life i have now.When i go out,or at home,my mind is thinking about you.Thinking of wanting to patch or what.Full of questions.How bout you?Haix... =( I hate to be in such a state where i can't even makes decision when u don't even know what to do.You don't know,you confused,does that mean that u can throw every problem to me?I don't like to find a person younger than me because like you,can't even make a decision for it.Can u prove it to me that you can lead me and i'm not the one leading u?Can?Be more mature and responsible?

2007-04-08T00:58:00.000+08:00

One of my friend asked me, "What do you want for your birthday?".

Living for 18years,every year of my birthday,i will never think what i want for my birthday.I know that my family will not remember my birthday and celebrate it for me,so what for i know what i want for my birthday?Until this year,i begin to ask myself.What do i really want for my birthday?I will never get the answer because,i felt that what birthday gift given by my friends is already the best gift i ever had.That's me.Easy and simple.

I really hope that this year 18 birthday,i can celebrate it with him and my dearest friends.

What i want in my life is simple.I just want "peace and happiness".Get richer is what everyone wants,but i just want to be normal,neither rich nor poor.

2007-04-07T22:38:00.000+08:00

Today i went church for Easter celebration.Well,alot of people there lo.Ken drove YingYi,Huiping,Emily and Me to Expo.We reached there quite early at about 2.30p.m.Yingyi,Emily and me went to Carnival.Not alot of people.Then we went to find food.hahaha...

By the time we finished eating,we went to queue up for the service.Wah!Alot of people queueing lo...quite long..Then we wait for quite awhile before the queue starts to move.Wah..perspiring lo...I'm not going to so crowded place again.*faint*.

Around 3plus,finally!!!We got into Expo Hall 8 and went to find seats.Do u know?Those seats were by snatching de lehx...Because many people.Today,we got around 30people,i guessed?But were sitting seperately becuase can't book 30 in a row.haix..Many many many people...

At 4.30p.m,service start le.Praise and Worship,i wanted to cry,but i didnt.I control my tears from flowing down my cheeks,followed by drama.The drama was really great!It's GREAT!Never bluff you.One part of the drama was so touching that i really wanted to cry.They act until so real.Wow!!Praise the lord!This is how i get to know more about Jesus too.

After drama,was preaching by Pastor Kong.I didn't note it down.Abit pity?Maybe...Haix...After that,all our CG members went for dinner at Carnival.Some went for 7.30p.m service.Quite funny that i kept laughing.Erm,guessed that moment was my happiness moment that i really can laugh from the bottom of my heart.haha...Was talking to one of my member and etc...haha..Really had a great time with all my CG members and my friends!Thanks! =)

Ken drove us home around 9p.m and reached home around 9.30p.m to 10p.m.Quite early?haha...

Ya!That's all for today.

Ps: Sometimes,i am wondering,r u the one for me?I went service,i saw you.You might think that i treat nothing happened and talk to you so happily.That's not me!In fact,i really want to avoid you or even don't want to talk to you because it's so embarassing for me.But i can't do that cuz it's a immature way.Why am i always the first to step out?WHY?Whenever i saw couple,i really envy them alot.Why can't we just like them?So bliss and happy?Haix..

What do you plan to do?or Can i say what are you going to do?Have you ever ask yourself this question or give it a thought?Or u just hack care?Why you seem to me was like you hack care about this r/s?Can we really commit ourself to each other?Can we?

nothing to say.

2007-04-06T13:01:00.000+08:00

6 more days to my birthday,which is on next Thursday,12th of April.How i wish to go back to M'sia to celebrate my birthday.Every Year of my birthday,i will just celebrate by eating food that i like.I had never really celebrate it with a cake. =) BUT i guess this year,i will celebrate it differently....haha.. =) Going to 18yrs old soon lerx...

Sometimes,i asked myself.What do i want in life?I couldn't even answer myself.I only know what i want for my studies.Life?Not at all.I am wondering,why am i always at faults?I just hate to get back to the place,i hate the people there too.Why?I just hope i had never been there before.I don't want to see him!I really hate it.Why must i made such a decision?So what i can't made up my mind?So what?Y i look up to her?Everything blame on me?Well,i just don't care and i won't go to the place anymore after this week.This place doesn't suit me at all.

You all don't even know what i'm thinking about or what i want in life.You all just know how to stress me up by asking this and that.I hate to be in this type of situation because i know nothing!Please..can you all just leave me alone?Stop calling me and stuff asking me whether i'm going or not.I won't go that place anymore after this week.I won't inform.Let me be irresponsible.I'll go just as when i like.I am thinking of going back to my hometown and stay there forever of my life.Atleast,i won't have so many problems here and there.Leave this sad place.

Today,i will be staying at home.Some of my friends ask me out but i just don't want to go out.I want to stay at home.If i go out,i will spent money.I just want to save up the money and spent it for other purpose.I just want to stay at home,that's it. =)

***pocket of stars***